Guy: I’ve heard rumors…
Girl: About me?
Guy: Yeah.
Girl: Me and Tina both got knocked up by you.
Guy: What?
Girl: And it’s not a rumor — it’s the truth.
Guy: How drunk was I?
Millersville, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: overheardinmillersville
- Posted on March 11, 2024
- Gossip, Hoochies, Pennsylvania
Engineer #1: What’s the deal with you and your two friends? What do you need two for?
Engineer #2: Hey! I like my friends! Both of them.
http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/2007/03/overdue-posting-new-blog-sweet.html
Overheard by: charlie
- Posted on February 15, 2024
- Coworkers, Overheard at Cornell, Relationships
Meathead: That’s the type of woman I want to marry. I’ll bend her over, then we can have hairy Aryan babies and eat hummus together. God, what I wouldn’t do to her!
Pleased girl with him: You know, I’m really glad I decided to invite you instead of Joe!
Cedar Point
Sandusky, Ohio
Overheard by: Ckiska
Girl #1: So, I told my dad to carry my futon up the stairs. There was no way I was going to!
Girl #2: Didn’t he just have major back surgery?
Girl #1: Yeah, but I didn’t want to strain myself. I’m, like, tiny. Plus, I had to make my room look good.
http://www.overheardinminneapolis.com/2007/04/oh_well_then_thats_ok.html
Overheard by: I just lost my appetite
- Posted on February 3, 2024
- Chicks, Family ties, Overheard in Minneapolis
Teen boy to friends: I tried to drink a whole gallon of milk once, but that didn’t happen and I ended up drinking a half gallon instead. Then I ended up pissing shit, man. It was awful, and it smelled so bad…
Skybridge, Providence Place Mall
Providence, Rhode Island
Overheard by: Ang
- Posted on January 30, 2024
- Poop, Rhode Island, Teens
Child: Look!
Mom: They’re just flamingos. They don’t do anything.
Disney World
Orlando, Florida
Overheard by: Suezahn
Dutch employee: Well, I don’t like your American style and I don’t like your American way, and I don’t want to speak English anymore [walks off].
American chick, to colleagues: Keep that bitch away from me or she’s dead.
Major bank
Amsterdam
Netherlands
- Posted on January 22, 2024
- Biotechs, Coworkers, Gripes, Netherlands
Girl: You were being cocky!
Upset ex-boyfriend: No, I wasn’t!
Girl: You couldn’t get any cockier if you had dicks coming out of your ears and eyeballs.
Elkhart, Indiana
Overheard by: ashley
Old nag, as train breaks down: Why’d we stop? What’s wrong?
Fellow commuter: We hit a buffalo.
Old nag: Really?!
Fellow commuter: Yes.
Worcester/Framingham Line to Boston, Massachusetts
Hobo, pointing to passerby: God is going to cum all over your face!
Westwood Village
Los Angeles, California
- Posted on January 18, 2024
- California, Cum, God, Hobos