Boy, hold­ing bodice-rip­per ro­mance nov­el: Dad, is this a book for fifth-graders?
Dis­tract­ed fa­ther: No. Put it back.
Boy: What is it?
Dis­tract­ed fa­ther: Hard­core pornog­ra­phy. Put it back.

Fair­wood, Wash­ing­ton

Over­heard by: he was so hope­ful