Bar­tender #1: Yeah, so I had this weird shit comin’ out­ta my dick. It was sick, dude. Like this funky green pus-like shit ooz­ing from the tip. Smelled like shit, too.
Bar­tender #2: Dude, you need to quit bon­ing so many filthy whores. You’re like rot­ting from the in­side.
Bar­tender #1: Shit, man, I don’t give a fuck. As long as I keep get­tin’ laid.
Bar­tender #2: You ain’t gonna be doin’ shit if your fuckin’ nasty dick falls off.
Bar­tender #1: I know, right? This last chick I nailed was a to­tal slut. I pulled down my pants and she could smell what­ev­er’s up with my cock. She goes “Ew, what stinks? Is that your dick?” And I go, “No, it’s my feet, I swear!” Then I just pulled her to­wards me and shoved it in. It was awe­some.
Bar­tender #2: Fuck, man. Some­thing’s def­i­nite­ly wrong with you.

Gaithers­burg, Mary­land

Over­heard by: Nasty Nate