Flight attendant (on PA): Chances are they're all middle seats. Find the one with the most attractive people, and take it.
Southwest Flight over California
Overheard by: Armen
Archive for the ‘Advice’ Category
And I’d Stay Away from Nestle’s, Too
Little girl reaches towards a sheep as it poops.
Little boy: Nooo! Stop! Don’t touch those raisinets! You can’t eat a sheep’s raisinets!
Birmingham Zoo
Alabama
Homosexual Panic Strikes Edward without Warning
Guy bidding farewell to pals: You guys take care of yourselves in the car… I didn’t mean that like it came out.
http://overheardinpdx.blogspot.com/
Overheard by: mike
A Mom Can Dream, Can’t She?
Angry mother on the bus: Come here and sit down!
Four-year-old: No, it’s okay. I’m being good.
Angry mother: This bus is going to stop suddenly and you’re going to fall down and crack your head open on one of the bars, and before the bus gets back around to the hospital you will bleed to death!
Pullman, Washington
Overheard by: jeff
You Need to Stop Watching Those Darned Kardashians, Sir.
Professor: You just need to expose yourself! That's how you better yourself!
Middle Tennessee State Univ
Murfreesboro, Tennessee
Overheard by: Libby K.
People in Minnesota Will Do Anything to Get Warm
20-ish girl on cell: Hey, yeah! Come to the beach, and we’ll set you on fire!
http://www.overheardinminneapolis.com/2007/08/bring_the_3_person_slingshot_t.html
Overheard by: don’t think the cops will approve
My Dad Kept Telling People to Kill Me
Student #1: I told my dad I wanted to be famous, and he told me I should kill someone. I was like, seven.
Student #2: At least he's supportive.
Philedelphia University, Pennsylvania
Be Careful It Doesn’t Squirt You in the Eye
Guy on cell: Now turn it on and set it to cow mode… Right, but be sure it’s in cow mode… No, you’ll know when it’s in cow mode.
Kroger Grocery
Conway, Arkansas
Overheard by: Not sure I want to know
Life Is Sweet; Don't Fuck It Up
Professor: No drinking and driving this weekend! No drugs! …and no babies.
Ball State University
Muncie, Indiana
Overheard by: Sara
And Button Up Your Pants, Sweetie
Little girl: I love you, pole.
[She kisses the pole.]
Father: Don’t kiss the pole! Keep it rated G!
Outside a Dim Sum Shop
Alameda, California