Woman #1: So you’re going to name your son Jesus?
Woman #2: Why not? People name their kids “Messiah,” and it means the same damn thing.
Alabama
Overheard by: Matthew Roberts
Archive for the ‘Alabama’ Category
It Really Doesn’t Age Well
Guy to another: Don’t shake my hand, dude, it’s still got pussy on it!
Men’s Bathroom
Bar, Alabama
Overheard by: So glad I don’t live here anymore
It May Be the First Test I Pass This Semester!
Girl: Where you going?
Guy: I am gonna go get tested for AIDS!
Girl: What?
Guy: You know, HIV! It’s free!
Auburn University
Auburn, Alabama
It’s Not Gay If It’s About Video Games
10-year-old boy to GameStop guy, after purchasing Mario Galaxy: Bye, I love you! I mean…wait. I meant “thank you.” I didn’t mean it! (runs away)
GameStop
Vestavia Hills, Alabama
Overheard by: that’s what they all say
Is This Any More Stupid Than the Political Interpretation? Discuss.
Teenage girl #1, explaining Shakespeare to friend: So, basically, Romeo is, like, a man whore. As soon as he knows some chick won’t have sex with him he gets all pissy and emo and goes after someone else.
Teenage girl #2: So, like, he just wants to make babies? Man, I always thought it was more romantic!
Teenage girl #1: Nope. He just wants to hop into bed with whoever’s available.
Birmingham, Alabama
You Mean, Like, Jersey Shore?
Marine with no game to clearly uninterested sales clerk: And we marines say “semper fi” to each other, do you know what that means?
Sales girl: Yeah, it…
Marine, interrupting: It means “always faithful.” It’s like Russian or some shit… No. Maybe Italian… Yeah, it’s Italian.
Mall
Birmingham, Alabama
And I’d Stay Away from Nestle’s, Too
Little girl reaches towards a sheep as it poops.
Little boy: Nooo! Stop! Don’t touch those raisinets! You can’t eat a sheep’s raisinets!
Birmingham Zoo
Alabama
After a Nasty Court Battle, She Got the Egg Back
Crazy English professor: Now, Herrick — his poems are like eggs… I used to have an ostrich egg… I knew the ostrich, too… Not that it makes any difference.
Birmingham-Southern College
Birmingham, Alabama
Overheard by: poetrywhat?
But the Make-a-Wish People Laughed at Me
Drunk guy to two girls: No, really! My ultimate fantasy is to have sex with a ridiculously hot girl while you two are on the futon eating cheetos!
Aburn University
Auburn, Alabama
Seriously, Just Kill Us Now
Pre-cal teacher to apathetic senior students: Now we’re getting into the fun stuff–exponential growth of fruit flies!
Prattville, Alabama
Overheard by: Lindsey
