Archive for the ‘Alabama’ Category

Is This Any More Stu­pid Than the Po­lit­i­cal In­ter­pre­ta­tion? Dis­cuss.

Teenage girl #1, ex­plain­ing Shake­speare to friend: So, ba­si­cal­ly, Romeo is, like, a man whore. As soon as he knows some chick won’t have sex with him he gets all pis­sy and emo and goes af­ter some­one else.
Teenage girl #2: So, like, he just wants to make ba­bies? Man, I al­ways thought it was more ro­man­tic!
Teenage girl #1: Nope. He just wants to hop in­to bed with who­ev­er’s avail­able.

Birm­ing­ham, Al­aba­ma

You Mean, Like, Jer­sey Shore?

Ma­rine with no game to clear­ly un­in­ter­est­ed sales clerk: And we marines say “sem­per fi” to each oth­er, do you know what that means?
Sales girl: Yeah, it…
Ma­rine, in­ter­rupt­ing: It means “al­ways faith­ful.” It’s like Russ­ian or some shit… No. Maybe Ital­ian… Yeah, it’s Ital­ian.

Birm­ing­ham, Al­aba­ma

The Old Good Cock/Bad Cock Rou­tine

Chat­ty la­dy: So, did I tell you I was get­ting mar­ried?
Man: That’s great. I’m hap­py for you.
Chat­ty la­dy: Yeah, I’m hav­ing a hard time giv­ing up my old boyfriend, though. He re­al­ly un­der­stands the way I like to be dom­i­nat­ed in bed. The sex is just sooo good, I’m not sure I can stop see­ing him.
Man: Uh­hh, yeah, I guess I can un­der­stand that.
Chat­ty la­dy: Yeah, I guess I’m just in a monog­a­mous re­la­tion­ship with two men.

Birm­ing­ham, Al­aba­ma

Why Yeast In­fec­tions Ex­ist: A Short Sto­ry.

Girl #1: Do you think I could wash my clothes with fab­ric soft­en­er? I don’t have any de­ter­gent.
Girl #2: That should prob­a­bly work.
(30 min­utes lat­er)
Girl #2: So, did it work?
Girl #1: Yeah… I think… they don’t smell any­more, at least. Good enough, right?

Laun­dry Room, Uni­ver­si­ty of Al­aba­ma
Birm­ing­ham, Al­aba­ma

Over­heard by: I don’t think it is

His Par­ents Say That About Any Place That’s Not Al­aba­ma

3rd grade girl, about es­say: I am writ­ing about tak­ing a va­ca­tion to heav­en!
Teacher: Okay, but why don’t you pick a place you can ac­tu­al­ly go on va­ca­tion? You can’t re­al­ly just vis­it heav­en.
3rd grade boy: Yes you can! I went to heav­en once to vis­it my aunt!

Auburn, Al­aba­ma