Man to girlfriend: I love you like a raccoon loves shiny things.
Anchorage, Alaska
Man to girlfriend: I love you like a raccoon loves shiny things.
Anchorage, Alaska
Disembodied male voice from next door: And I was like, “hey, do you wanna see my circumcision scar?”
Sitka, Alaska
Overheard by: Hailey
Old lady to emo girl: Al Gore is really saving the earth.
Emo girl wearing bag that says “go green”: Wait… Who’s Al Gore?
Ketchikan, Alaska
Overheard by: Claire
Professor #1: There are other people here who put stuff up ducks’ butts.
Professor #2: Yeah, but you do it for science!
Fairbanks, Alaska
Overheard by: Lowlie Worm
Girl to guy trying to grab her underwear: Ow! What the fuck are you doing?
Boy: Sorry! I was trying to give you a wedgie, but I didn’t realize that you already had one.
Alaska Pacific University
Anchorage, Alaska
Giddy girl, to guy in a wheelchair: Well, you certainly have sexual harassment down pat.
Art Department
University of Alaska
Literature professor, after reciting Hamlet’s “To be or not to be…”: So now you all need a Valium…count on me to ruin your day.
English Lit Class
Anchorage, Alaska
Overheard by: Rosencrantz
Little girl: Why did she get remarried? Did she forget?
Alaska
Bimbette: How are the African kids starving? Why don’t they just… eat more?
Anchorage, Alaska
Teary-eyed teen: But I don’t wanna work…I wanna go to Istanbul!
Palmer, Alaska
Hat Tip 🎩 to The Marketing Scientist