Archive for the ‘Animals’ Category

The Lassie “E! True Hol­ly­wood Sto­ry” Was Too Con­tro­ver­sial for TV

40-some­thing suit: You know how some­times you can love a dog so much it’s, like, il­le­gal?
40-some­thing woman: (looks at him blankly)
40-some­thing suit: You know? So that it’s, like, il­le­gal?
40-some­thing woman, look­ing straight ahead: Umm, let’s look at Hal­loween can­dy.

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/438564745/calling-peta.html

Over­heard by: I love my dog, but not that much

It Was All, “What Am I, a Fuck­ing Cow?”

Red­neck girl: So do you wor­ship cows?
Hin­du boy: Yes, that’s part of our re­li­gion.
Red­neck girl: No, I mean you. Do you wor­ship cows?
Hin­du boy: Yes! I do, my peo­ple do, it’s our re­li­gion!
Red­neck girl: So when you go to church, there’s a cow there?
Hin­du boy: No, we don’t go to church.
Red­neck girl: Have you ever gone cow-tip­ping?
Hin­du boy: What’s that?
Red­neck girl: It’s when you run up to a cow in the mid­dle of the night and push it over and it goes “mooooooooo!” I tried to tip a horse once, too, but it just looked at me.

High School
North Car­oli­na

And To­geth­er, Our Geek­i­ness Is Un­stop­pable

20-some­thing girl: If any­one ever punch­es me, all of the tur­tles in west­ern Penn­syl­va­nia will get to­geth­er, form a gi­ant stack, and bite that per­son.
20-some­thing guy: Wow. Like Voltron?
20-some­thing girl: Why did I mar­ry you?
20-some­thing guy: *Be­cause* I say things like that.
20-some­thing girl (sigh­ing): Yeah, you’re right.

Wal­nut St
Pitts­burgh, Penn­syl­va­nia