Young blonde on cell: Dad, there’s no butchers on Oxford Street. It’s all gay bars and kebab shops.
Sydney
Australia
Archive for the ‘Australia’ Category
I Can’t Understand Why It’s Illegal!
Big dude on phone: Yeah, I am feeling better… I woke up at four a.m. this morning, but it’s okay — I’m taking that euthanasia stuff and it seems to be helping.
Tram, Victoria Street
Melbourne, Victoria
Australia
Overheard by: Louise
New Jersey Tourists Are Easily Recognizable
Mother, about a TV: It’s really heavy! It’s as heavy as–
Four-year-old girl: –A dead body.
Bellingen
Australia
Like Fat Elvis!
Grandmother to little boy: Elvis! Come here, we’re going. (to store person) His mother was a big Elvis fan, so now he’s a little Elvis.
Little boy: I have hair on my back!
Brisbane
Australia
Tomorrow’s Lessons: What About Bob? and Chasing Amy
Girl #1: Oh, Kill Bill is on this week!
Girl #2: Yeah.
Girl #1: I wanna watch that. I think I’d really like it. I really like martial arts films.
(pause)
Girl #1: So, is Bill the name of the guy she wants to kill?
Girl #2, incredulous: Uh-huh.
Perth
Australia
I’m Unfamiliar With That Game
Preschool boy: Can I play with you?
Preschool girl: Come near me and I’ll stab you.
Playground
New South Wales
Australia
Overheard by: courtney
It’s in the Microwave
20-something chick on mobile: How many times do I have to tell you? There is no cocaine in my fridge!
University
Queensland
Australia
Overheard by: how many times
We Already Knew That About the Eiffel Tower
Lecturer: I don’t know, a horny Frenchman made this up.
Chemistry Lecture
University of Melbourne
Australia
Overheard by: laura
…But the Security Guard Was All, “Public Fountains Aren’t Toilets!”
Drunk guy to friend: And it was like a mini-orgasm. I swear, it was the best pee ever.
Monash University Dorms
Melbourne
Australia
Overheard by: Australian L
Why Casper the Friendly Ghost Has Difficulty Keeping a Girlfriend
Really stoned girl: Oh god, my first relationship was horrible. It was just six weeks of me being scared of his genitals.
Canberra
Australia
Overheard by: Boffins
