Archive for the ‘California’ Category

And I’m Wash­ing It Down with Lax­a­tives!

Mod­el scout, hand­ing out card to hot tall teen: I know you’re prob­a­bly mod­el­ing al­ready, but take my card any­way.
Short­er teen girl to friend, af­ter scout has left: Fuck you. The on­ly rea­son he gave you his card in­stead of me was be­cause I’m eat­ing a cook­ie. But it’s the on­ly thing I’ve had to eat to­day!

Stu­dio City, Cal­i­for­nia

Over­heard by: Urz

From the Run­away Best-Sell­er Is My Child Goth?

Moth­er to two laugh­ing chil­dren run­ning down side­walk: Get back here! Hold her hand! Get back here right this in­stant! [Catch­es them and grabs their hands, pulling them back to­wards their house, point­ing at a near­by car.] That car is sit­ting there. What if that man would have backed out and hit you?! What if he could­n’t have seen you? What then?
Four-year old boy: Then hooray! Hooray!

Los An­ge­les, Cal­i­for­nia

An­swer Him, Bitch!

Lit­tle boy blow­ing in­to wrap­ping pa­per tube: Is this too loud, Mom­my? [Mom is silent.] Mom­my, is that too loud? [Si­lence, so boy screams] Was that loud enough for you, Mom­my?!

La­gu­na Niguel, Cal­i­for­nia