Teenybopper #1: Oooh, look at the nail polish I just got!
Teenybopper #2: I never use Sally Hansen nail polish anymore, because they test on animals.
Teenybopper #1: Really? What does that even mean?
Teenybopper #2: I don’t know. Something about pigs, I think…
Ottawa, Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: EL
Gym teacher, during stretches: If you do it this way, it makes it easier and also more challenging.
Henry Wise Wood High School
Calgary
Canadia
Dude: Just press your nipple up against the glass.
Roller Derby Game
Victoria
Canadia
Overheard by: Jay
Disheveled hipster: His dick was so crooked that it had, like, a knuckle!
Calgary
Canadia
Overheard by: Mrs The Experience
Girl: Did you just get a vagina?
Boy: I think it's bleeding.
Vancouver
Canadia
Girl on cell: Are avocados vegetarian?
Saskatoon
Saskatchewan
Canadia
Mom: Arrrrgh. My brain just isn’t working today!
Eight-year-old (deadpan): Did you try turning it off and on again?
Steveston
Canadia
Overheard by: laughing sangria out my nose
Brunette girl: I love whole wheat nachos.
Blonde girl: They should make whole wheat potato chips.
(silence)
Brunette girl: Ohmigod! You're serious? There is no such thing as a whole wheat potato! (laughter)
Blonde girl: Wow! I am really not that dumb.
Nova Scotia
Canadia
Overheard by: nicole
Strange curly-haired girl: Make sure you make Edmund really hot.
Morose pale dark-haired girl: Why?
Strange curly-haired girl: Dude! Did you not read King Lear? Bitches were all over his dick!
Toronto
Canadia
Overheard by: Anneliese
Teen girl: I don’t know — it just seems like everyone’s in the Olympics now.
Vancouver, British Columbia
Canadia
Overheard by: snooper