Archive for the ‘Canadia’ Category

Like a University Professor Ever Has to Pay for It

Statistics professor: So let's say we ask a random question, such as “have you had unprotected sex with a prostitute in the last week?”.
(class laughs)
Statistics professor: Most people would answer “no.” Including myself. I'll leave it up to you to decide if that's the truth or not.

University of Guelph
Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: Danielle

The Secret Is to Keep Moving Fast

Teen girl #1: So what you’re saying is, when I fart I’m smelling my own shit-smell?
Teen girl #2: Exactly. That’s how it works.
Teen girl #1: That’s nasty. I can’t believe people do that all day!

Toronto, Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: Sass

Mom Has Very High Standards

Lazy girl: So, I told my mom that you and I were going to take tennis lessons together in the summer.
Workout friend: Oh, yeah? What did she say?
Lazy girl: She just laughed at me.
Workout friend: Why?
Lazy friend: She said I was too slow, uncoordinated, and she didn’t outright say it, but I’m sure she thinks I’m mildly retarded.

Ottawa, Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: A mild case of the ADD