Acting professor: We just tweaked a few things to make it Christmassy and kidnapped Santa.
Point Park University
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: ZB
Archive for the ‘Colleges & Universities’ Category
…What’s Your Thesis Advisor Like?
Guy, walking angrily: She thinks that vampires evolved, so now they can be out in the sun like normal people. She also thinks it’s degrading to have sex in any position other than missionary, when she’s sober.
University of Delaware
Overheard by: what???
“Who Can Shower Less?” Is a Dangerous Game
Girl #1: Awww… I knew I smelled you!
Girl #2: (laughs hysterically)
Bennington College
Bennington, Vermont
Which Also Influences My Sleep Patterns and the Santa Ana Winds
Male student: I feel that this case may have been influenced by the fact that…well, people just hate Michael Bolton.
Seton Hall Law School
South Orange, New Jersey
Overheard by: he’s got a point
Those Poopyheads Have Already Exhausted Their Five Minutes of Fame
College girl: There, I’ve belittled and insulted The View without using the word “bitch” or the c‑word.
Student Center, Montclair State University
New Jersey
Overheard by: …and that itself is a feat
You Know I Like to Watch
Blonde to friend: You can’t give me ice cream and think that makes up for you having sex while I had mono!
UMass, Amherst
When All Along I Was Thor, God Of Thunder!
Professor: And you thought I was some geeky wanker, going on about agriculture!
Eastern Michigan University
Some News Just Sounds Better from a Payphone
Loud man on payphone: He said they removed something like four pimples from his prostate. What? No! Pimples! Pimples on his prostate!
Florida State Campus
Overheard by: Dr. Ian Maxwell von Indypants
You Know… Down There
Anthropology professor teaching Sex and Gender: I’m afraid I’ll have to leave class early today…I have to go to the hospital, I have a doctor’s appointment…for something…at a certain time…
Western Washington University
Bellingham, Washington
Translation: They Rejected Me
Loud man on cell: Harvard is the crusty nipple of liberalism.
Colorado University
Denver, Colorado
