Archive for the ‘Colleges & Universities’ Category

I’m Just a Trust, but Verify Kind Of Gal

College girl: Yeah, but I don’t fuck my kids.
Friend: Well, you don’t have any yet.
College girl, looking down: I can’t believe I just checked my vagina before I answered that.

College Campus
SoCal, California

Greeting Cards Are Getting More and More Specific

Girl: Every time I walk into Stop ‘N Shop and get a whiff of Irish Spring I think of your testicles.

Seton Hall University
South Orange, New Jersey

Overheard by: Never will think of Irish Spring the same way again

You Lithuanian Girls Know What I’m Talking About

Anthropology teacher: All women are beautiful, whether they’re tall and skinny or not. Including female Sasquatch.

USF
Florida

Just Killing Time Before the Dance Party in the Romance Languages Section

Brunette: So, are you gonna get some studying done?
Blonde: No, not really…
Brunette: So, you’re here just to kill time?
Blonde: Yeah, to play.

Baillieu Library
University of Melbourne
Australia

How Is a Dorm Room Like a Crime Scene, Alex?

Drunk girl: Oh! So you’re not going to go home with your girlfriend when she is asking you and her roommate isn’t even home! Oh! Oh! (boyfriend whispers something to her) I don’t care if I’m on my period or not!

University of Dayton
Dayton, Ohio

With a Clatter, Suzette’s Mind Blew Open

Professor, reading student midterm reviews of his teaching style: When asked the question, “what would help you understand the material better?” someone wrote “if you wore a thong.” My answer to that is, “how do you know I’m not?”
(class erupts in laughter)

University of Michigan, Dearborn

Overheard by: Nehal