Guy: My parents seem fake. My parents’ friends seem really really fake.
Texas Christian University
Fort Worth, Texas
Archive for the ‘Colleges & Universities’ Category
At Least, He Said It Was Mayonnaise
Girl on cell: Yeah, last semester the professor had this obsession with mayonnaise. It was freaking everyone out.
College of Charleston
Charleston, South Carolina
Overheard by: Tori
…Next to Making Undergrads Uncomfortable.
Professor: I advise you all to make love, at least once, outside in the rain. It’s the best feeling in the world.
Marist College
Poughkeepsie, New York
Overheard by: Mackenzie
Just Not Enough to Do It Myself
Chick: We’re going to see Saw II, right?
Dude: It’s probably gonna suck, though.
Chick: I just want to see people fucking die! You like watching people die, don’t you?
Dude: Well, yeah.
Ursinus College
Collegeville, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: A student
…Drugs? It’s Drugs, Right?
Dumb brunette #1: Well, he likes Sarah and Matt…
Dumb brunette #2: They don’t count, everyone likes them!
Dumb brunette #1: Well, my boyfriend doesn’t like any of my friends, then. I don’t really like any of my friends.
Smart, older blonde walking by: Well, dear, there’s a simple solution to that.
Dumb brunette #1: Oh? What is it?
University Library, Kent State
Kent, Ohio
Don’t All Women Talk Shit Behind Your Back?
Asian guy #1: She’s the kind of woman who stands to the side, but she’s also the kind of woman who talks shit behind your back.
Asian guy #2: Yeah, traditional Asian bitch.
UCSD
San Diego, California
To Them, Your Aquarium Is Just a Raw Bar
Guy at computer: It’s this whole thing with the penguins, man…
Friend: Yeah, I know. It’ll work itself out, though.
Monash University
Melbourne
Australia
Overheard by: Timothy
Dream Big, Kids.
Girl: I want a squirrel.
Friend: I want a cheeseburger.
UT
Austin, Texas
Though I’m Still Working on Context
Girl walking with two guys: I’m going to teabag you! …I’m so glad I know what that means now!
WSU
Pullman, Washington
Overheard by: Rachel
I Hate When They Do It While You’re Driving, and You Can’t See the Road
Frustrated gamer playing The Legend of Zelda: Did you see that? She’s such a slut! Her vagina was just totally up in link’s face. And he’s like, twelve. Why are women like that all the time?
University of Massachusetts
Overheard by: the girl in the corner cramming for finals
