Suit #1, referring to scar on suit #2’s throat: What happened to you?
Suit #2: My daughter is batshit. What of it?
Denver, Colorado
Overheard by: Julia
Archive for the ‘Colorado’ Category
Sorry, I Temporarily Lost Consciousness When You Said “Tasty Man Snack”
Goth girl getting stitches: When I want a tasty man snack, I have me a PB&J!
Skyridge Hospital ER
Denver, Colorado
I’m Not Sticking My Dick Anywhere That Smells That Bad
Ranting idiot: I mean, what the fuck? We live in the United States. It is 2006. There is no excuse for having fucking rotten teeth. I don’t care if she is your sister — brush your fucking teeth!
Town Hall Café
Empire, Colorado
Overheard by: try 2007 — TK
According to a Priest and a Rabbi I Met in a Bar Once
Goth girl wearing blue beehive wig: So Morgan Freeman, a college professor, and a hot guy walk into a ska club.
Friend: And?
Goth girl: Oh, there’s no punchline, that actually happened.
Denver, Colorado
A Plague on Both Their Home Courts!
Chick #1: Mike Dunleavy went to a Catholic school, and Troy Murphy went to a Jesuit school.
Chick #2: They’re star-crossed lovers! One is a Catholic, the other a Jesuit!
Pepsi Center
Denver, Colorado
That Guy Is Always Purple Raining on Our Parade.
Museum employee: I’m from Minnesota, originally.
Guy: I lived in Minnesota for a while, a long time back. Nice place, but there was way too much of that one guy. You know, that guy? The little guy? With “purple …”?
Museum employee: …Prince?
Guy: Yeah, that’s the one.
Art Museum
Denver, Colorado
On the Plus Side, She Was Doing Some Pretty Nifty Baton Tricks
Security guard to woman who just drove over the curb: Are you drunk?
Woman driver: No, she (points to passenger) was distracting me with my vibrator!
Hospital Parking Lot
Denver, Colorado
Not the Demographic to Fear in Colorado
Girl #1: Why does Denzel Washington with a gun freak me out?
Girl #2: Because he’s black.
Movie Theater
Colorado
But Perhaps I’m Mis-Remembering Sesame Street
Guy, singing: He’ll only be your friend if he touches your breast…
Girl: What?!
Guy, not singing anymore: It’s like my favorite song.
Metro State
Denver, Colorado
Overheard by: Squid
We Don’t Quite Get It, But We Like It
Girl standing in front of a pro-life poster: Well, if that’s true I owe god a lot of child support.
Colorado
