Pilot over PA, after taxiing to the gate for ten minutes: Let me know if you guys see something that looks like an airport.
Denver International Airport
Denver, Colorado
Overheard by: they’re not kidding about being the country’s biggest airport
Archive for the ‘Colorado’ Category
But You’re the One Who Keeps Calling the Social Worker, Billy.
Mother to screaming child: Look, if it were up to me, you could watch all the porn you want.
Highlands Ranch, Colorado
Unless You Count Wisconsin Ladies’ Upper Thighs
Loud drunk guy on bus: You’re from Oklahoma? Oklahoma has the best cottage cheese in the world!
Denver, Colorado
Overheard by: I would have believed Wisconsin…
He Heimliched Me from Behind and Just Kept Going
Girl in car, while on cell phone: I was coughing because I was eating a cookie while trying to have sex!
Denver, Colorado
Overheard by: Squid
That’s a Great Idea!
Goth girl: So by working to benefit communism, they started to think that communism wasn’t actually so bad!
Creepy guy: You know, some people say that young people aren’t deep. You’ve proved them wrong. (leaves)
Fat friend: Good thing he didn’t hear us talking about how Sims should be able to sell drugs.
Highlands Ranch, Colorado
Great Motor Skills for a 1‑Year-Old, Though.
Suit #1, referring to scar on suit #2’s throat: What happened to you?
Suit #2: My daughter is batshit. What of it?
Denver, Colorado
Overheard by: Julia
Sorry, I Temporarily Lost Consciousness When You Said “Tasty Man Snack”
Goth girl getting stitches: When I want a tasty man snack, I have me a PB&J!
Skyridge Hospital ER
Denver, Colorado
I’m Not Sticking My Dick Anywhere That Smells That Bad
Ranting idiot: I mean, what the fuck? We live in the United States. It is 2006. There is no excuse for having fucking rotten teeth. I don’t care if she is your sister — brush your fucking teeth!
Town Hall Café
Empire, Colorado
Overheard by: try 2007 — TK
According to a Priest and a Rabbi I Met in a Bar Once
Goth girl wearing blue beehive wig: So Morgan Freeman, a college professor, and a hot guy walk into a ska club.
Friend: And?
Goth girl: Oh, there’s no punchline, that actually happened.
Denver, Colorado
A Plague on Both Their Home Courts!
Chick #1: Mike Dunleavy went to a Catholic school, and Troy Murphy went to a Jesuit school.
Chick #2: They’re star-crossed lovers! One is a Catholic, the other a Jesuit!
Pepsi Center
Denver, Colorado
