Girl #1, looking at picture: Oh my gosh! Look, the first aider is totally judging her. If I was passed out from crack, I would so not wanna be judged.
Girl #2: Oh, I know, totally!
Thailand
Archive for the ‘Compare and contrast’ Category
Straight Men: Dammit, You Guys Ruin Everything!
Gay sports fan to table of gay sports fans, while watching Packers game: So, are you a packer or a packee?
Washington, DC
Is the Moral of the Ant and Grasshopper Story
Lecturer: People who are happy, hopeful, and relaxed… are a pain in the ass.
Auckland
New Zealand
That’s a Description Best Saved for Molten Chocolate Cake
Chick #1: That’s the best episode of SpongeBob ever.
Chick #2: I knooow!
Chick #1: It’s like an orgasm!
Chick #2: No. (pause) No, it’s not.
Littleton, Colorado
The Prelude to This Season’s Greatest Love Story
Hobo sitting on sidewalk: Hey, can you spare some change?
Student: Sorry, man. I’m as broke as you right now.
Hobo: Grab a seat.
Guelph
Ontario
Canadia
When Aunt Jemima Eats Burritos, Everyone Knows It.
Churchgoer to another: Did you fart? Something smells like buttermilk.
Methodist Church
Knoxville, Tennessee
Overheard by: Nick
Is This Gonna Be the “Figs Vs. Fags” Debate All Over Again?
Barista: Those aren’t dates, those are lesbians!
Dixon, California
Overheard by: Michelle
And Stop Pulling the Pork!
(five-year-old boy is slapping and punching packages of beef and pork)
Father: Josh! Stop slapping the meat.
Bystander: (laughs out loud)
Father (hissing): No! Not that!
Safeway
Colorado Springs, Colorado
Overheard by: TK
I Guess I Never Really Thought of Simba in Those Terms
Girl #1: Even when I was a little kid I knew it was Christian propaganda. I was like, “Hey, this lion is Jesus!“
Girl #2: That was great, say it again.
Girl #1: This lion is Jesus!
AMC Century City
And Get Your Desks Out Of That V Formation
Teacher: Sit the fuck down and stop acting like a bird!
High School Classroom
Englewood, Colorado
