Mom to two kids: Now, you can both get one paperback each, but remember, they have to be normal paperbacks. Nothing about dragons.
New Haven, Connecticut
Archive for the ‘Connecticut’ Category
For Love, Apparently
Little girl: I need a knife.
Concerned mother: What? Why?
Little girl: So I can cut your fingers off!
Concerned mother: Ashley*! Now, that’s not nice!
Little girl: But I’m hungry!
Old Navy
Plainville, Connecticut
What’s This Baby Poking Out of Me?
Girl on cell: I can’t tell if I’m losing weight from softball or gaining weight from being hungry all the time.
Hartford, Connecticut
Overheard by: Claire
They’re Like the IPhones Of People!
Tall black girl with fauxhawk: I don’t know why everyone doesn’t have an Asian fetish! They’re pocket sized and stunning!
New Haven, Connecticut
I Hate This Country and Its Degenerate Cinema!
Frustrated man with heavy Arabic accent to wife: I got the most chicky-flick movies I could find!
Supermarket
Connecticut
In That I Like Football Players
Chick: So basically I slept with this really hot Australian rugby player that I knew for less than 24 hours, and my dead friend watched.
Dude: We are so different.
Derby, Connecticut
That’s What She Said
Professor: Now, let’s try smallening the interval.
Hartford, Connecticut
Overheard by: Claire
It’s Like Bibbidi-Bobbidi-Boob!
College girl: My bra — it’s, like, magical! It mysteriously unclips itself throughout the day!
Fairfield University
Fairfield, Connecticut
Overheard by: GladMyBraIsntMagical..
Dude, I Think That Might Be a Sex Crime
Fat guy: So, I was getting head when all of a sudden I got this case of explosive diarrhea! I shitted everywhere, dude!
University of Hartford
West Hartford, Connecticut
Overheard by: Joa
But It’s Just a Cornish Game Hen
Professor: It must seem like I’m beating you over the head with a frozen chicken breast.
Hartford, Connecticut
Overheard by: Claire
