Archive for the ‘Customers’ Category

Got My Own Per­son­al Trail Of Tears Over Here

Crazy old white la­dy try­ing on wed­ding veil: So I al­ways won­dered why I did­n’t look good in these things…until 2004.
Dis­in­ter­est­ed cus­tomer: Oh?
Crazy old white la­dy: Yeah, then I found out I was part Na­tive Amer­i­can. At least 5%.
Dis­in­ter­est­ed cus­tomer (con­fused): Oh…?
Crazy, old white la­dy: Yeah. That’s why I don’t look good in veils. Cause we Na­tive Amer­i­cans don’t wear them.
Dis­in­ter­est­ed cus­tomer: I got mar­ried in a cour­t­house.
Crazy old white la­dy: I hate to say it since I am part white, but damn those white peo­ple!

Good­will
Al­toona, Penn­syl­va­nia

Would You Mind Tak­ing a Pic­ture Of Us With It?

[A young woman in a wet­suit and a young man in nor­mal cloth­ing are stand­ing near the pack­aged meats.]Female em­ploy­ee: Can I help you with any­thing?
Young woman: Oh, no thanks, we’re just ad­mir­ing the ba­con.
Fe­male em­ploy­ee: Oh. Okay! Have a nice day!

Vons
Ven­tu­ra, Cal­i­for­nia

Es­pe­cial­ly the One from Lit­tle House on the Prairie

Very ob­nox­ious drunk man to long-suf­fer­ing wait­ress: Hey, what’s your name, any­way?
Wait­ress (cold­ly): Melis­sa.
Drunk man (soft­ly): Awww, my daugh­ter’s name is Melis­sa.
Wait­ress: Well, I’m sor­ry to be the one to tell you this, but we usu­al­ly turn out slut­ty.

Bar
Los An­ge­les, Cal­i­for­nia