Guy: Men are bastards. I’m a man.
Girl: Then what does that make you?
Guy: Huh?
Girl: You said men are bastards. So then what does that make you?
Guy, not paying attention: Wanna dance?
Norman, Oklahoma
Archive for the ‘Dancing’ Category
I’m Relatively Free of Parasites
Young buck #1: Do you want to go out to the track and race?
Young buck #2: I’m not fond of dust baths.
Monroe Community College
Rochester, New York
But I Can Smell Cop on You a Mile Away
Eight-year-old: I believe the fanny dance is in order here.
Amused passerby: Awww, what is the fanny dance?
Eight-year-old: Wouldn’t you like to know.
Dallas, Texas
I’d Still Take It Down If Either Of You Ever Wants a Job
Girl #1 on Facebook: And then I gave my mom a lap dance.
Girl #2, looking at pictures: It looks like she was enjoying it.
UMass
Dartmouth, Massachusetts
All Those Murdered Tomatoes…
College guy: I like salsa, but it makes me sad.
Duluth, Minnesota
Overheard by: Nic
Well, I Got a Lap Dance in the Buffet Line
Girl one: Smell my face. Smell right here. Doesn’t it smell great? The stripper I got a lap dance from was wearing great perfume.
Girl two: It smells like pickles.
Toby Keith’s Restaurant
Las Vegas, Nevada
Overheard by: At least it doesn’t smell like tuna
Why Laguna Beach Got Canceled
Girl: I told him I didn’t dance, because I didn’t want to dance with him, but all these other guys asked me if I wanted to dance and I had to say no because I told him I didn’t dance, but I really wanted to dance. So we have to go, so that I can dance.
Friend: So, did you dance with him?
Pasadena, California
Overheard by: needs new friends
I Got My NASCAR Merit Badge!
Dancing girl #1: How do you know how to line dance?
Dancing girl #2: I was a Girl Scout!
Dancing girl #1: What? Are all Girl Scouts rednecks?
Connecticut
The Peer Pressure Is Overwhelming
20-something suit on cell (angrily): But mom, you don’t understand! Everyone I know is already on the folk dancing team!
Brigham Young University
Provo, Utah
Is There Ever a Viable Reason for Riverdancing?
Guy to friend: Do you have a reason to riverdance on my testicles?
Boone, North Carolina
