Girl #1: Why is it that so many midgets end up getting into acting? There must be a shortage of midget actors…
Girl #2: Shortage?
Sault Ste Marie
Ontario
Canadia
Archive for the ‘Default’ Category
So I Won't Be Voting for Him for President
Gay man to friend: He's not hot enough to have AIDS!
Cleveland, Ohio
Overheard by: Rachel Kaiser
Always a Burning Question
Sensitive soul: Why would I fuck you if you have a rash?
Dining Hall, Stony Brook University
Stony Brook, New York
Overheard by: Slightly amused but scared
Or Worse, in Canadia Wearing a Spandex Unitard
Ten-year-old boy to another: Yeah, I told my sister that if she kept it up, she'd end up in Mexico with her panties off.
Charleston, South Carolina
Overheard by: i want to meet the sister
I Prefer to Think Of Them As My “Solar Panels”
(blind shuts in lounge area, blocking really bright sunshine, everybody quickly looks up)
Hot Chinese girl: Hey!
Friend: And finally they drop the blinds. My eyes were starting to hurt.
Hot Chinese girl: But I like the sunshine! It's so bright and warm and it emphasizes my boobs by casting shadows on my chest!
University of Toronto
Canadia
Dressed As a Boy!
12-year-old: She's such a slut. She went on a date alone with a boy!
Mother: I don't believe that.
12-year-old: It's true! I was there!
Denver, Colorado
I Used to Think It Was Sad, but Now I Can Laugh about It
Dude: I may be bipolar, but she’s fucking crazy!
650 NE Holladay Street
Portland, Oregon
Overheard by: Too Many Papercuts
That's Just Our German Chocolate Cake, Ma'am
Little old lady to cashier: Satan puked here.
Rapid City, South Dakota
…As My Grandma Always Said to Me.
Calculus lecturer: If I had 20 million dollars to give you as a gift…I would, just to see you fuck up.
Perth
Western Australia
Australia
Almost As If Drinking Affected My Judgment in Some Way
Guy #1: I once tried to hit on a chick while I was drunk and throwing up, but now that's just a fun story I tell and nobody lost their respect for me.
Guy #2: Except for the girl you were hitting on.
Guy #1: Well, I don't know. Her nickname was “dicktooth.”
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Claire