The Dev­as­tat­ing Ef­fects of Cal­ic­o­caine

Teen girl: I am so strung out on kit­tens right now, it’s not even fun­ny.

High school class­room
Au­ro­ra, Col­orado

We Should Do a Bar­beque or Some­thing

Man: You look fa­mil­iar.
Woman: I think we are neigh­bors. 1st and Bates?
Man: Yeah, we live on the 1st Street side.
Woman: Ah, I live near the crack­house on Bates.
Man: Can you be more spe­cif­ic?
Woman: The red crack­house on Bates.

dcist.com

Eliot Spitzer’s next big tar­get

Thugette: Yo, I think Di­et Coke got some nico­tine in it, ’cause I can’t stop drink­ing it!
Thug: Yeah, for re­al. They still must be puttin’ some coke in that jank.
Passer­by: It’s called caf­feine.

9th & M Streets
Wash­ing­ton, DC

Over­heard by: Eri­ka

One Of the Rea­sons We Came to Thai­land.

Girl #1, look­ing at pic­ture: Oh my gosh! Look, the first aider is to­tal­ly judg­ing her. If I was passed out from crack, I would so not wan­na be judged.
Girl #2: Oh, I know, to­tal­ly!

Thai­land

In To­tal­ly Un­re­lat­ed News, Which Of You Left an Ear­ring in My Car­pet Last Night?

Bi­ol­o­gy prof: So the di­nosaurs were eat­ing all the irid­i­um poi­soned plants, and dy­ing of drug over­dos­es. That’s why you find them in all these weird po­si­tions, they were hav­ing bad trips and just… dy­ing.

Al­bu­querque, New Mex­i­co

Over­heard by: Danielle

I Asked the Pur­ple Mon­key in the Cor­ner, and Even He Did­n’t Know.

Man: I just had a dream where I was stoned, and when I woke up, I could­n’t tell if I was stoned or not.

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/355805032/the-safe-assumption-is-yes.html

Over­heard by: jfa

De­cid­ed Her True Love Was Air Traf­fic Con­trol

Hip­ster: Yeah, well, at least she stopped huff­ing paint.

http://overheardinphilly.blogspot.com/

Over­heard by: anony­mous

It’s in the Mi­crowave

20-some­thing chick on mo­bile: How many times do I have to tell you? There is no co­caine in my fridge!

Uni­ver­si­ty
Queens­land
Aus­tralia

Over­heard by: how many times

Which Al­so Ex­plains the Peanut But­ter Smears

Col­lege stu­dent: That one an­swer is wrong. You put a nine in­stead of a six.
Pro­fes­sor: I was prob­a­bly stoned at the time.

Sus­sex, New Jer­sey

I’m Still Not Shar­ing with You.

Girl: Don’t wor­ry, I won’t be lone­ly tonight. I’ve got a date with a grav­i­ty bong.
Ston­er guy: … That’s, like, the sweet­est thing I’ve ever heard.

Sacra­men­to, Cal­i­for­nia

Over­heard by: Megan­Ma­ma