Archive for the ‘Education’ Category

Dude, When You Go to Work You're Totally Gonna Shit

High school freshman #1: Sometimes I wish I didn't live somewhere so industrialized. Why can't I live somewhere where people are hunters and gatherers?
High school freshman #2: I know, we waste so much time in school getting an “education.” I could learn so much more out in the world.
High school freshman #1: Yeah, and I don't understand why people go to work and shit.

Train Station
Chicago, Illinois

Huh? Can't Talk. Masturbating

Professor, on last day of sex addiction class: I'm putting a website on the board for anyone who's interested in more information on how to become a certified sex addict.
(entire class cheers)
Professor: I meant “sex addiction therapist.”
Student to another: He just spent a whole semester telling us that sex addiction isn't fun. Clearly we didn't catch on.

Chestnut Hill College
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

I Suppose I Could Have One of My Concubines Answer Them, Though

Student: Professor, will you be able to answer e-mails while you are away, since our final is in a week?
Uncomfortable Japanese professor with strange British/Japanese accent: No, I will not be able to answer students’ e-mails because most of the time I come home I am drunk.
Students: [Incredulous silence. Laughter.]

Philosophy class
McGill University
Canadia

Overheard by: student who hated this prof until this comment…

When You Locate the Controls Of Your Spacecraft

Quirky lesbian professor leading class in Kegel exercises: And everybody squeeze, hold, hold…release and squeeze, two, three…release.
Ditzy Indian, after shiver spasm: It gives me the willies!
Quirky lesbian professor: It's great, right!

Health Ed Class
Borough of Manhattan Community College, New York

Overheard by: Trying not to laugh at all the serious faces trying to hide these private exercises