Flustered mother to screaming toddler: Stop that shouting, or I'll be sick on you!
(toddler shuts up abruptly)
Leeds
England
Overheard by: Magpie
Archive for the ‘England’ Category
…So Just Let Me Trim the Ellen Haircut Already!
Annoyed teenage boy to girlfriend: You've got to understand that I'm never going to be Justin Bieber!
London
England
Overheard by: KK
Introducing Madame Toussaud's Naughtiest Exhibition Yet
Enthusiastic undergraduate to group of friends: I never knew you could do that with wax!
Oxford
England
Overheard by: Intrigued Grad Student
…Now It's My Turn to Say Something About Cavity Searches
Security: What are you studying?
Girl checking books in X-ray machine: Proper oral technique.
Security: (snickers)
Girl: Dentistry!
Security: Oh.
Airpot
Newcastle
England
British Cooking: Explained
Boy eating lunch: I am without sin! That's why potatoes come down my chimney!
Dagenham
Essex
England
Overheard by: Anthony Mercer
Michael Jackson: At Least I’m Consistent!
Woman talking on phone to friend: I have a real thing for little boys. I never used to…
Train Leaving Brighton
England
Overheard by: Wishing she hadn’t tuned in at that point
How Else Can You Make an Omelette, Though?
Girl to friends: Well, he's really nice, but I'm not sure if he'd like destroying the babies.
Oxford
England
Overheard by: HERTFORD
David Arquette Loves Visiting the U.K.
Quiet, intense, plain chubby girl to skinny guy with child-molester mustache: When you fuck me, choke me.
Leamington Spa
England
Overheard by: Blee
I Still Hate to Buy Her a Two-Year Planner, Though
Guy on one side of the store: So how's your friend who has cancer?
Woman in queue, thirty feet away: Oh, she's getting better!
Guy: Really?
Woman: Yeah, they put her on this herbal diet and now she's getting better.
Guy: Wow.
Woman: Yeah, it's amazing.
Guy: So what sort of cancer is it?
Woman: I'm not sure…
Guy: Is it terminus cancer?
Woman: Yeah, I think that's it.
Guy: Terminus cancer, yeah?
Woman: Yeah, yeah, but she's getting better.
London
England
Overheard by: Irongate
I Need My Face for Other Things
Flamboyant grad student, on ice skating: I went years ago… and fell flat on my face. Then I decided that I was too important for this!
Oxford
England