Tall, skinny kid: He’s…like…suspiciously Asian.
Tall skinny friend: That’s what I thought too!
Arby’s
Tempe, Arizona
Tall, skinny kid: He’s…like…suspiciously Asian.
Tall skinny friend: That’s what I thought too!
Arby’s
Tempe, Arizona
Drunk male friend: What do you want for your birthday, baby? I can make it happen, just tell me what you want!
Really, really drunk birthday girl, pointing at someone else: I want in that guy’s pants!
Norfolk, Virginia
Teenage girl to friend: And then he stuck his finger up my butt, and said “Oh, yeah, do you like that, babe?“
Friend: See, there you go. If you don’t sit a guy down and tell him not to go up your butt, he will. Look at you, you’re butt-fingered.
Subway Store
Maitland
Australia
Guy with burger to friend, loudly: Penguins are fish, and fish don’t eat fish!
Vancouver
Canadia
Overheard by: kib
Model scout, handing out card to hot tall teen: I know you’re probably modeling already, but take my card anyway.
Shorter teen girl to friend, after scout has left: Fuck you. The only reason he gave you his card instead of me was because I’m eating a cookie. But it’s the only thing I’ve had to eat today!
Starbucks
Studio City, California
Overheard by: Urz
Stoner #1: Do you have telekinesis?
Stoner #2: No, but I got call-waiting and that three-way call thing.
McDonald’s
Escondido, California
Overheard by: DLo
Guy: She’s Irish, so I really hope at some point she says: “Shut yer piehole!“
Girl: I could pay her ten bucks to say it, unless that violated the pie hole code.
Guy: First rule of pie hole: There is no pie hole code.
http://overheardlines.blogspot.com/2008/06/american-guy-apparently-on-his-way-to.html
Overheard by: tim
Old lady to another: Mary started crying because she thought they were taking her back to New Jersey.
Pizza Shop
Lima, Pennsylvania
Guy to girl in line at ATM: Stop playing with his butthole! What are you doing to his butthole?!
Champaign, Illinois
Overheard by: In front of her in line, and afraid to turn around
Girl eating pizza to friends: Like, do I want to meet aliens? Yes!
Pizza Place
Tempe, Arizona
Overheard by: Felicity
Hat Tip 🎩 to The Marketing Scientist