Girl #1: Shit!
Girl #2: What?
Girl #1: I forgot to ask him if he's gay!
Girl #2: But you don't even know him!
Girl #1: I know, and now I've lost my chance…I'll wonder for the rest of my life if he was gay or not. And maybe one day, when I'm old and gray, I'll see him, at a bus-stop maybe, and then I'll try to ask him…and he'll be already on the bus, and I'll never know.
Girl #2: You're kind of a freak.
University of Delaware
Little girl, inside port-a-potty: Mommy! Mommy!
Mommy: Just be quiet and go potty.
Little girl: Mommy, do you know what it feels like in here? It’s like a little house where I’ll always be protected.
Renaissance Festival
Maryland
Overheard by: Nancy Whiskey
Blonde, on childbirth: Well, there's blood, and there are vaginas, and both make people uncomfortable.
Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Tween girl #1: I have to tell you something — I don’t think Rachel is that hot.
Tween girl #2: Oh my god, I’m so glad you said that, ’cause I’m afraid to talk to people about her because everyone thinks she is so pretty.
Tween girl #1: They were doing this rating thing where they rate people on a scale, and Ryan gave her a seven.
Tween girl #2: She is totally not a seven — her boobs are inverted.
Premier Oaks Movie Theater
Melbourne, Florida
Overheard by: *shakes head*
Teen girl: Mom, guess what he got me for an early Christmas present?
Mother: What, honey?
Teen girl: A gas-mask bong–like in that movie Knocked Up. And it's purple!
Mother: Jeez, your dork-o-meter is in the red.
MARTA Train
Atlanta, Georgia
20-something girl with beer in hand to 20-something guy behind her: I recognize you!
20-something guy: Yeah! You puked on my car!
Detroit, Michigan
Overheard by: Sam
Girl #1: So when is that thing you guys are doing?
Girl #2: Oh my god! You have to go! We're all going to get naked and walk around campus all day.
Girl #1: I honestly would, but I have tattoos in some really unconventional places.
Girl #2: Oh, I understand totally.
Chem Lab, William and Mary
Williamsburg, Virginia
Granddaughter: Is it wet?
Grandmother: Oh, believe me. It's wet.
Waco, Texas
Overheard by: I need to get whatever they're using.
Girl: I told him I didn't dance, because I didn't want to dance with him, but all these other guys asked me if I wanted to dance and I had to say no because I told him I didn't dance, but I really wanted to dance. So we have to go, so that I can dance.
Friend: So, did you dance with him?
Pasadena, California
Overheard by: needs new friends
Male student: So, how’s your new roommate?
Female student: Well, she has one hundred thirty-three thongs.
Male student: She sounds like a horrible person.
Maryland Institute College of Art
Baltimore, Maryland