High school girl to friend: You know what I hate? Cocks.
Friend: I know! They’re so annoying.
California
Archive for the ‘Girls’ Category
What With the Muffin Top, Camel Toe, and Side Ponytail
Guy to girl: You just give off that vibe that says “make fun of me!”
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: marisawin
Might Even Trump the Popularity of Pregnant or Fat?
Black guy: You keep hearing about how racist Britain’s getting, it’s pretty scary.
White girlfriend: Oh, totally. I think that before anyone in that country over 40 is allowed to make a public statement they should take a test that’s like “is this quaint, or just racist?” and if they fail they shouldn’t be allowed to say anything.
Black guy: That would be an awesome game show.
Calgary
Alberta
Canadia
How Wars Start: Encapsulated.
20-something woman #1: I have mixed feelings about this bar and grill.
20-something man: I hate this bar and grill.
20-something woman #2: I’m gonna burn down this bar and grill!
Las Vegas, Nevada
Her Idol Is Martha Stewart
Dad, seeing his little girl spit in a soda bottle: This is disgusting, nobody will want to drink from it now.
Little girl: I know, that’s why I did it.
Dad: That’s not nice. Smart, but not nice.
Pumpkin Farm
Half Moon Bay, California
We Thought Only Americans Knew This Little About Sex Ed.
[Line for ladies’ room]Girl #1: Hi, do you mind if I cut in front of you? It’s urgent.
Girl #2: Sure.
Girl #1: Thanks, I have to change my tampon.
Girl #2: [Blank stare.]Girl #1: I have to make sure I change it often. Not too often, because once I changed it too much and got chlamydia.
Girl #2: Oh…[Suppresses laugh.]
Western Australia
Australia
Only Because They Found the Kiddie Pool Filled with It
Girl to boyfriend: Why’d you go and tell all the guys on the fifth floor that I have some crazy fetish with lubricating foods?
Guy: I didn’t say anything!
Girl: Well, they were talking about the Nutella.
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Laura G.
How Hot That Sounds Depends on How Horny You Are
Nerd guy: Did you get a haircut?
Indie girl: No. Why?
Nerd guy: Your bangs are on the other side.
Indie girl: Oh, I didn’t shower today.
Godfrey, Illinois
Overheard by: M
If It Could Happen to Lance Armstrong, It Could Happen to Anybody!
Girl #1: I’m all freaked out now! I bet you she’s pregnant! My sister’s pregnant!
Girl #2: I’m sure she’s not pregnant, you’re assuming the worst.
Girl #1: Oh my god! What if she has testicle cancer?!
Adelaide
Australia
Overheard by: monkey
Then He Was Like, “This Is a Job Interview, Tanya.”
Black teen girl to friend: He was like “you’re so high you don’t even know what to do!” and I was like “nigga, this ain’t the first time I smoked!”
Columbus, Ohio
Overheard by: Hancock
