20-something hot girl to friend: He tore off all his clothes, threw him on his back on the bar, then covered his nipples in whipped cream.
Denver, Colorado
20-something hot girl to friend: He tore off all his clothes, threw him on his back on the bar, then covered his nipples in whipped cream.
Denver, Colorado
Blonde student to teacher: Is the New Testament in the Torah?
Edmonton
Canadia
20-something girl to another: I love hairy West Coast men. If they look like they haven’t showered or shaved in a good week, send ’em my way.
Calgary
Alberta
Canadia
Drunk male friend: What do you want for your birthday, baby? I can make it happen, just tell me what you want!
Really, really drunk birthday girl, pointing at someone else: I want in that guy’s pants!
Norfolk, Virginia
Dad: That’s an awfully big brownie. You know it’s so big it’s a Girl Scout.
Daughter: Silence.
Dad: Hey, this is funny stuff from your dad.
(daughter stares at him in silence)
Buffalo, New York
Overheard by: Tim
Girl: My friends are always saying I need to make a Facebook page and I’m like, “Why? I talk to you a‑holes enough already!”
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/416332366/so-you-can-send-me-gifts-you-spent-a-dollar-on.html
Overheard by: sleeping on the job
Teenage girl to friend: And then he stuck his finger up my butt, and said “Oh, yeah, do you like that, babe?“
Friend: See, there you go. If you don’t sit a guy down and tell him not to go up your butt, he will. Look at you, you’re butt-fingered.
Subway Store
Maitland
Australia
Girl: I was having a bad day, so he put me in some predicament bondage to try to cheer me up.
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: fetishgirl
Girl on cell: His thing…it was like a big lamb sandwich!
http://overheardinpdx.blogspot.com/2008/07/we-call-it-beastilicious.html
Overheard by: aaron
Brunette: I wish I could speak those sweet African languages.
Blonde: What sweet African languages?
Brunette: Ya know, the ones where they cluck at each other. Cluck cluck clickity clack cluck.
Blonde: Yeah! I know what you mean. Clack clack cluck cluck click cluck clacky clack. (laughs)
Brunette, laughing: I bet they just make stuff up!
Blonde: Yeah, dude! Clack clack clickity clacky clack clack cluck! AKA, wanna go get some cow…meat?
Brunette, laughing: You’re retarded. I don’t think anyone in Africa says shit like that.
Michigan
Hat Tip 🎩 to The Marketing Scientist