Guy: Men are bastards. I’m a man.
Girl: Then what does that make you?
Guy: Huh?
Girl: You said men are bastards. So then what does that make you?
Guy, not paying attention: Wanna dance?
Norman, Oklahoma
Guy: Men are bastards. I’m a man.
Girl: Then what does that make you?
Guy: Huh?
Girl: You said men are bastards. So then what does that make you?
Guy, not paying attention: Wanna dance?
Norman, Oklahoma
Guy: You never know, perhaps he’ll like it.
Girl, happily: I taste… Horrendous!
Oxford
England
Overheard by: Tim
Girl #1: My two biggest concerns in life are rowing and gays.
Girl #2: Rowing and what?
Girl #1: Gays!
George Mason University
Fairfax, Virginia
Male student: We were learning about harmanfadites in my psych class today.
Female student: What’s that?
Male student It’s when a person is born with boy and girl parts.
Female student: Nasty.
Male student: Yeah. I was wondering, if two of them have sex, are they both gay? Or lesbians?
Female student: I can’t talk about this while I am eating.
Wayne State University
Detroit, Michigan
Overheard by: Jonson
Teenage girl to friends: The groin is the eye, no?
Teen friend: The eyes are the groin of the face!
First teen: Right!
Ferry
Larkspur, California
Overheard by: I Know, I know
Little girl: I love you, pole.
[She kisses the pole.]
Father: Don’t kiss the pole! Keep it rated G!
Outside a Dim Sum Shop
Alameda, California
20-something girl: Do you remember that guy last night?
Friend: Oh, him? Yeah, I think he motor-boated me.
Canisius College
Buffalo, New York
Middle-aged guy to 20-something girl: You could hire chickens, they’re not union!
BART
San Francisco, California
Hipster girl: Ugh, I had, like, the worst day yesterday. I was skipping on the quad, and I ripped my skinny jeans.
Vassar College
Poughkeepsie, New York
Girl: Well, the sad thing is I’m gonna have to treat you like Morgan when she doesn’t want to take her ear infection pills.
Smith College
Northampton, Massachusetts
Hat Tip 🎩 to The Marketing Scientist