Math teacher: If you fuck with numbers, you're fucking with god! And people get killed for that shit! University of Miami, Florida Overheard by: Tormented Math Student
College student: So first my girlfriend and I split, then I got accepted into the frat, and then I found god…I couldn't handle spring break after that weekend.
Old lady #1: … And now he’s crippled!
Old lady #2: Well, of course he is. That’s what God does to people who get divorced.
Old lady #1: That’s true. Milwaukee, Wisconsin Overheard by: Voudou
Professor: So, basically god has to suppress the gag reflex when he looks at you; but it's okay because he loves you anyway.
University of Akron
Akron, Ohio Overheard by: Rebecca
Crazy: … And we got to thank God! Thank him for the babies, for all our little children…! And we got to thank Him for creating sexual intercourse so we can make those babies! And we got to thank God for French fries!
California Overheard by: Lauren agrees with this Man
Professor: No, pondering eternal truths is not a good excuse for missing my class…I'd need a signed note from god.
Williamsport, Pennsylvania Overheard by: JQ
Catholic school girl #1: (sings “Total Eclipse of the Heart”)
Catholic school girl #2: Stop it. I swear to god, I will shank you. Baton Rouge, Louisiana Overheard by: Adelaie
Religion teacher to class of girls: And remember girls, always wear a bikini in the shower, because god is always watching you.
Professor, whispering: What is god doing with female breasts?
Atlanta, Georgia Overheard by: Caylin
Teenage girl: God is in every queef. Albuquerque, New Mexico