Hoochie: Yeah, I don’t know, but Josh and I totally hooked up for a while last year.
Friend: What? Why?!
Hoochie: What do you mean, ‘Why’? Josh is hot.
Friend: Dude, hooking up with Josh is like hanging a sign on your vagina that says, ‘Come on in, chlamydia.’ If I was looking for a communicable disease, Josh is the first place I’d go.
Hoochie: Oh…
California State University-Chico
Chico, California
Overheard by: Kimberly
Punk gesticulating wildly to friends: Unlike Europeans, they have to earn their souls… And they never do, man, they never do!
Harvard Square
Cambridge, Massachusetts
Overheard by: wtf?!
Roomie #1: I wonder what ever happened to James*. I mean, we haven’t seen him since fifth grade. I hope he’s not in a mental home or something — him and his weird mom. Maybe he’s finally doing what he’s always wanted to do: work with dinosaurs.
Roomie #2: Yeah, or living with them.
Roomie #1: That is sooo true.
Montclair State University
Montclair, New Jersey
Overheard by: i love dinosaurs
Really happy college chick: So many people will die. You know why? The demons are hungry. When you die they eat your soul. They’re hungry and they aren’t happy about it, so people have to die.
Route 16 bus
http://www.overheardinminneapolis.com/2007/03/happy_souls_fill_their_appetit.html
Overheard by: wishing I had chosen a different seat
Fireman: Yeah, so we were all standing around waiting for this suicidal guy to do whatever, and then we got hungry.
Girlfriend: So what did you all do?
Fireman: We went back to the station and made hot dogs.
Girlfriend: What about the guy?
Fireman: I mean, the cops were still there, and we got back before anything happened. Or, well, before anything eventful happened.
Girlfriend: What kind of hot dogs were they?
Target line
Atlanta, Georgia
Chick: … So then I started exfoliating my nipples every morning…
London
England
Overheard by: gin
Guy on cell: Hey… Rainy… Ummm, well, yeah I’ve kind of played with it, but not to fruition. Hold on, I’m on the L in Chicago. Hey, guys, Jeff* wants to know if you’ve ever masturbated while driving on a long car trip.
Friend #1: No.
Friend #2: No.
Guy on cell: Nick* and Joe* say no. Hey, um, I gotta go…
Chicago L
Illinois
Overheard by: J to the P
Frat boy: So, the prof walked into class and he looked right at me and he said, ‘Drew*, your right testicle is hanging out.’ That’s how he started the class!
http://weirdosofwinnipeg.blogspot.com/2007/01/ballsy.html
Six-year-old soccer player #1: It’s about having fun! It’s not all about winning.
Six-year-old soccer player #2: My mom says it is.
Lincoln City, Oregon
Lesbian to girlfriend: … That was back when I was dating this pharmacist and my sister-in-law decided to start this rumor that both of us were into this thing… [makes subtle fisting motion].
Elevator, Penrose Hospital
Colorado Springs, Colorado
Hat Tip 🎩 to The Marketing Scientist
