Hot girl: You know why I don’t come here? Just so you can have an idea, last time I came here I lost my virginity!
Queer: Oh my god! That long ago? With who? In the bathroom?!
Hot girl: With some guy, randomly… We went to his friend’s apartment, and it was awful because I have this problem that… Okay, many, many people are listening in to our conversation… I think I want to change the subject. When did you dye your hair like that?
Milo’s Garage
São Paulo
Brazil
Girl #1: Dude, I think I’m in a relationship…
Girl #2: What the fuck?
Girl #1: I’ll explain later.
Girl #2: I think there’s still half a burrito in the fridge.
Long Beach, California
Overheard by: sara nicole
Hoochie, about guy she met on a band trip: He was gorgeous, with a dick as big as my arm! [Notices band class is listening] Oh, my bad.
High school
Utah
Haughty woman: Oh yeah, he’s getting a divorce.
Friend: Why?
Haughty woman: She stalks him ever since he left. She followed him into Walgreens and tried to beat him down with a toilet scrubber!
Indianapolis, Indiana
Overheard by: I would want a divorce too…
Lab-mate #1, looking at pictures: Wouldn’t that be great if it really existed?
Lab-mate #2: Definitely.
Lab-mate #1: Then people could say, ‘Where you going?’ and I’d say, ‘I’m going to Pussy Mountain.’
Boston, Massachusetts
Woman: So then he said either I have to quit smoking, or I have to have a baby.
Outback Steakhouse
Leominster, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Amycakes
Chick: Well, I was going to rub the peanut butter all over Maureen*, but that didn’t happen, so…
Gateway High School
Colorado
Overheard by: Pilbur
Dude: It’s apropos that she gestated in a FEMA trailer.
State College, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: marsupial jones
Young mom, looking disgusted at a paparazzi photo of Pamela Anderson: That’s disgusting.
Four-year-old son: What?
Young mom: Honey, what’s wrong with this picture?
Four-year-old son: I can see her penis.
Bowling Alley
Indiana
Overheard by: Aunt Oblivious
Six-year-old: My dad took me to this music festival. It was just a bunch of guys in the woods banging drums and making litter.
http://www.overheardinminneapolis.com/2007/07/and.html
Overheard by: litter machine
Hat Tip 🎩 to The Marketing Scientist
