Archive for the ‘Gripes’ Category

Guess Which One’s the “Naughty Li­brar­i­an”

Li­brary work­er #1: Do I have to lick it?
Li­brary work­er #2: … What?
Li­brary work­er #1: The en­ve­lope. Do I have to lick it?
Li­brary work­er #2: You could tape it, I guess…
Li­brary work­er #1: Great, be­cause af­ter last night, I am to­tal­ly out of sali­va.

Main Li­brary, Kent State Uni­ver­si­ty
Kent, Ohio

Let Me Guess– Rain­bow Sher­bert?

Drunk­en girl: I don’t know, Luke, I’m just sick and tired of peo­ple who want to sit in their rooms and watch YouTube videos and eat sher­bert.
Drunk­en guy: You don’t like sher­bert?
Drunk­en girl: No, I like it… but on­ly with ad­ven­ture.
Drunk­en guy: I want­ed ad­ven­ture. I feel kind of bad, though, that I did­n’t ex­per­i­ment enough.
Drunk­en girl: With what?
Drunk­en guy: With guys. I don’t know, it just has­n’t hap­pened.
Drunk­en girl: Well, don’t rush it. If you let it hap­pen nat­u­ral­ly, it will.
Drunk­en guy: But what if I don’t like it? And say, “No, this is­n’t for me”?
Drunk­en girl: Let’s go eat some­thing.
Drunk­en guy: Sher­bert?
Drunk­en girl: Yep.

Clare­mont, Cal­i­for­nia

You Think I Should Put on Some Pants?

Drunk guy on cell: Hey, this is Er­ic*. Just call­ing to see how you were do­ing at three in the morn­ing. [To chick passer­by] Hey! I saw you tonight at the club!
An­gry drunk chick: Get away from me!
Drunk guy on cell, in­to phone: What the fuck is up with every girl on cam­pus think­ing I want to rape them? Just be­cause I’m drunk does­n’t mean I’m a fuck­ing per­vert.

Uni­ver­si­ty of Mis­souri-Co­lum­bia
Co­lum­bia, Mis­souri

Over­heard by: Caesar22