Archive for the ‘Health & Hygiene’ Category

When You Lo­cate the Con­trols Of Your Space­craft

Quirky les­bian pro­fes­sor lead­ing class in Kegel ex­er­cis­es: And every­body squeeze, hold, hold…release and squeeze, two, three…release.
Ditzy In­di­an, af­ter shiv­er spasm: It gives me the willies!
Quirky les­bian pro­fes­sor: It’s great, right!

Health Ed Class
Bor­ough of Man­hat­tan Com­mu­ni­ty Col­lege, New York

Over­heard by: Try­ing not to laugh at all the se­ri­ous faces try­ing to hide these pri­vate ex­er­cis­es

It’ll Pop Up Again in the Spring

Guy #1: Are you gonna get test­ed?
Guy #2: I think the Lau­ren thing pret­ty much takes care of it.
Guy #3: You should still get test­ed.
Guy #2: Yeeeah, but I don’t like get­ting blood tak­en from me and I don’t have any like, symp­toms, so…
Guy #3: Well, I haven’t seen your pe­nis.

Si­mon Fras­er Uni­ver­si­ty
British Co­lum­bia
Cana­dia

Guess Which One’s the “Naughty Li­brar­i­an”

Li­brary work­er #1: Do I have to lick it?
Li­brary work­er #2: … What?
Li­brary work­er #1: The en­ve­lope. Do I have to lick it?
Li­brary work­er #2: You could tape it, I guess…
Li­brary work­er #1: Great, be­cause af­ter last night, I am to­tal­ly out of sali­va.

Main Li­brary, Kent State Uni­ver­si­ty
Kent, Ohio

The Episode Of MacGuyver I’d Pay to See

Weird la­dy get­ting her hair cut: The nail just would­n’t stay down on my toe. So be­cause it was all loose, junk kept get­ting in there. The doc­tor ba­si­cal­ly told me that junk would just keep get­ting in there.
Styl­ist: Wow!
(a minute lat­er)
Weird la­dy get­ting her hair cut: If I could have one of those guys do my wed­ding, I’d be all like, “here’s a doily and a pa­per cup, see what you can do.“
Styl­ist: Yeah.
Weird la­dy get­ting her hair cut: I mean if you can’t have a ban­gin wed­ding in Puer­to Ri­co, you might as well see what you can get from a doily and a pa­per cup here.
Styl­ist: Yeah.

Su­per­cuts
Penn­syl­va­nia