Archive for the ‘Health & Hygiene’ Category

Guess Which One’s the “Naughty Li­brar­i­an”

Li­brary work­er #1: Do I have to lick it?
Li­brary work­er #2: … What?
Li­brary work­er #1: The en­ve­lope. Do I have to lick it?
Li­brary work­er #2: You could tape it, I guess…
Li­brary work­er #1: Great, be­cause af­ter last night, I am to­tal­ly out of sali­va.

Main Li­brary, Kent State Uni­ver­si­ty
Kent, Ohio

The Episode Of MacGuyver I’d Pay to See

Weird la­dy get­ting her hair cut: The nail just would­n’t stay down on my toe. So be­cause it was all loose, junk kept get­ting in there. The doc­tor ba­si­cal­ly told me that junk would just keep get­ting in there.
Styl­ist: Wow!
(a minute lat­er)
Weird la­dy get­ting her hair cut: If I could have one of those guys do my wed­ding, I’d be all like, “here’s a doily and a pa­per cup, see what you can do.“
Styl­ist: Yeah.
Weird la­dy get­ting her hair cut: I mean if you can’t have a ban­gin wed­ding in Puer­to Ri­co, you might as well see what you can get from a doily and a pa­per cup here.
Styl­ist: Yeah.

Su­per­cuts
Penn­syl­va­nia