Working-class hippie: Oh, I have another porn story!
Foreign hippie: The one about your mom?
Working-class hippie: No, no, this one’s about Matt*–my surrogate father.
Amherst, Massachusetts
Archive for the ‘Hippies’ Category
Just Made My Last Payment
Hippie chick: I am the proud owner of an American vagina, thank you very much.
Western Washington University
Bellingham, Washington
Overheard by: Rachel
It’s Like Having a Principle, Only Easier
Granola guy: Yeah man, Ron Paul is awesome! He, like, votes no on everything.
Bonnaroo Festival
Manchester, Tennessee
Fuck You.
Hippie wannabe: Mmm, this tastes so much better than a non-solar-powered smoothie.
Dickinson College Earthfest
Carlisle, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Future Unemployed
Why Hippies So Often Make Millions… Oh, Wait
Hippie, addressing group: If you can get you guitar to play music at the same frequency as telepathy, you’ll make millions!
Portland, Oregon
Gotta Go With Your Strengths
20-something hippie blonde: What can I say? I love humping people!
Tenley Town
Washington, DC
Getting Fucked Also Temporarily Disconnects One’s Gaydar
Hippie teenage girl: He’s such a screaming campy queer, I thought he was gay–but he’s not! At least, he doesn’t seem gay when he’s fucking you. He does all the rest of the time, though.
Hither Green
London
England
Overheard by: Jess
Some Gay Marriage Opponents’ “Slippery Slope” Arguments Are Tenuous at Best
Really tall hippie to really short girl in overalls: If that’s what you think, then why can’t I rape dead people?
El Campesino
Altoona, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Louise H
Here, Have Some Incense and Peppermints
Hippie guy: I suggest you stop picking up small animals and fruit skins. It’s not good for you.
Eugene, Oregon
Just Taking a Vacation from the Metric System
Guy, seeing a techno dance party: Hey! Are you guys in the circus?
Hippie kid with dreads #1: Fuck no!
Hippie kid with dreads #2: No, we’re Canadian.
Atlanta, Georgia
