Working-class hippie: Oh, I have another porn story!
Foreign hippie: The one about your mom?
Working-class hippie: No, no, this one’s about Matt* – my surrogate father.
Amherst, Massachusetts
Working-class hippie: Oh, I have another porn story!
Foreign hippie: The one about your mom?
Working-class hippie: No, no, this one’s about Matt* – my surrogate father.
Amherst, Massachusetts
Hippie wannabe: Mmm, this tastes so much better than a non-solar-powered smoothie.
Dickinson College Earthfest
Carlisle, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Future Unemployed
Granola guy: Yeah man, Ron Paul is awesome! He, like, votes no on everything.
Bonnaroo Festival
Manchester, Tennessee
Hippie chick: I am the proud owner of an American vagina, thank you very much.
Western Washington University
Bellingham, Washington
Overheard by: Rachel
Hippie, addressing group: If you can get you guitar to play music at the same frequency as telepathy, you’ll make millions!
Portland, Oregon
20-something hippie blonde: What can I say? I love humping people!
Tenley Town
Washington, DC
Hippie teenage girl: He’s such a screaming campy queer, I thought he was gay – but he’s not! At least, he doesn’t seem gay when he’s fucking you. He does all the rest of the time, though.
Hither Green
London
England
Overheard by: Jess
Really tall hippie to really short girl in overalls: If that’s what you think, then why can’t I rape dead people?
El Campesino
Altoona, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Louise H
Hippie guy: I suggest you stop picking up small animals and fruit skins. It’s not good for you.
Eugene, Oregon
Guy, seeing a techno dance party: Hey! Are you guys in the circus?
Hippie kid with dreads #1: Fuck no!
Hippie kid with dreads #2: No, we’re Canadian.
Atlanta, Georgia
Hat Tip 🎩 to The Marketing Scientist