De­cid­ed Her True Love Was Air Traf­fic Con­trol

Hip­ster: Yeah, well, at least she stopped huff­ing paint.

http://overheardinphilly.blogspot.com/

Over­heard by: anony­mous

Do You Think I Would Fail His Class?

Asian hip­ster: Peo­ple stare at him, and he re­sents them for star­ing at him. But I’m like, ‘Maybe you should bathe!‘
Jew­ish hip­ster: You should give him an ele­phant tran­quil­iz­er or some­thing.

http://overheardinthevalley.blogspot.com/2007/05/people-in-valley-like-elephants-what-is.html

Over­heard by: Glowien

What You Nev­er Knew about the Last Sup­per

Hip­ster chick: You know, you can tell it’s a good par­ty by how many peo­ple get their stom­achs pumped, and whether or not Mark gets naked.
Friend: To­tal­ly.

Star­bucks
Vir­ginia

But, in the End, He Let Us Both Grad­u­ate

Hip­ster girl to guy: I got lucky. All I had to do was make out with him. (mo­tions to oth­er hip­ster girl stand­ing be­side them) She had to suck him off!

At­lanta, Geor­gia

Clear­ly, You Are No Don­na Reed

Hip­ster guy: I cried so much when I watched it.
Hip­ster girl: It’s a Won­der­ful Life made you cry? Ha!
Hip­ster guy: Shh­hh! (looks around furtive­ly)

Welling­ton
New Zealand

Thanks, Pres­i­dent Oba­ma!

White hip­ster to oth­ers: I’ve no­ticed the black kids in Harlem are start­ing to wear skin­ny jeans and skate­board. It’s great… ’cause it’s, like, cool to be smart again.

Mass­a­chus­setts

Stood in Front of One Uri­nal and Peed in An­oth­er

Di­sheveled hip­ster: His dick was so crooked that it had, like, a knuck­le!

Cal­gary
Cana­dia

Over­heard by: Mrs The Ex­pe­ri­ence

A+

Male art stu­dent in re­sponse to fe­male art stu­den­t’s sculp­ture: It’s re­al­ly kind of mor­ti­fy­ing­ly vagi­nal.

Al­leghe­ny Col­lege
Meadville Penn­syl­va­nia

Or Breast Dis­play Units

Man­ly hip­ster #1: She’s been re­al­ly in­to these half sweater type things late­ly.
Man­ly hip­ster #2: Yeah, they’re called “shrugs”.

TOAD
Cam­bridge, Mass­a­chu­setts

Just As a Con­ver­sa­tion Piece, Y’­know?

Hip­ster: You’re buy­ing an Ethiopi­an? I did that once.

Bal­ti­more, Mary­land

Over­heard by: Tick­le Feet