Archive for the ‘Illinois’ Category

Al­most As If Drink­ing Af­fect­ed My Judg­ment in Some Way

Guy #1: I once tried to hit on a chick while I was drunk and throw­ing up, but now that’s just a fun sto­ry I tell and no­body lost their re­spect for me.
Guy #2: Ex­cept for the girl you were hit­ting on.
Guy #1: Well, I don’t know. Her nick­name was “dick­tooth.”

Chica­go, Illi­nois

Over­heard by: Claire

Wait, an Out­line, or Sol­id Shad­ed?

Girl: I bet he would.
Friend: No, he would­n’t.
Girl: I’ll call him now. [Di­als] Hey, hon­ey. Quick ques­tion: if I had a tat­too of a dick on the in­side of my thigh about half an inch away from my pussy, would you lick it? [Pause] No. I said ‘if’… Well, no, I’m not say­ing it’s to­tal­ly out of the ques­tion… Fine. We’ll talk about it when I get home. [To friend] See? I told you he would!

Bus stop
Chica­go, Illi­nois

Over­heard by: Dana