Archive for the ‘Illinois’ Category

Your Hon­or, I Was On­ly Fol­low­ing His In­struc­tions

Small Mex­i­can man in hot dog suit: Eat me, eat me, eat me, eat me, eat me.
20-ish chick wait­ing to cross street: No, thank you.
Hot dog man: Eat me, eat me, eat me, eat me!
20-ish chick: No, re­al­ly — thank you, but I’ll pass. [Mut­ter­ing] God, will this light ever change?!
Hot dog man: Eat me, eat me, eat me!

Wrigley Field
Chica­go, Illi­nois

Over­heard by: Cubs Fan

When You Work for the City, You Take What Fun You Can Get

In­dia-In­di­an con­duc­tor: We will need to stand by in just a few min­utes for some main­te­nance work. We’re hav­ing some prob­lems with the brakes, and they will need to be checked… Ac­tu­al­ly, they’re re­al­ly not work­ing… At all. [Every­one ex­changes looks when doors in­stant­ly close and train pulls out of sta­tion, round­ing the next cor­ner at high speed.]

Chica­go El, Brown Line
Chica­go, Illi­nois

Over­heard by: Com­fort­ing words