Girl #1: I have to gloat a little. Who’s the perv now, bitches?
Girl #2: Still us.
Girl #1: Well, duh, still us. But now them, too!
Girl #2: Totally.
Maynard, Massachusetts
Girl #1: I have to gloat a little. Who’s the perv now, bitches?
Girl #2: Still us.
Girl #1: Well, duh, still us. But now them, too!
Girl #2: Totally.
Maynard, Massachusetts
Professor: And you go home and watch something dumb on TV, like that Tila Tequila show with the lesbians and the guys… I don’t understand who would want to date her anyway, she looks like a disease on legs.
Harbor College, California
7‑year old kid #1: It’s raining.
7‑year old kid #2: The hurricanes are upon us, bitch!
7‑year old kid #1, after long pause: It’s raining.
New Jersey
Overheard by: it was raining
Lady to friend: So I told him… ten dollars for a hand job!
Friend: Good for you! What an asshole!
Ashland & North Ave
Chicago, Illinois
Very drunk 20-something girl trying to play darts: So what do I do?
30-something guy #1: Just throw ’em.
30-something guy #2: Failing that, love, just take your top off.
Very drunk 20-something girl: Cheeky motherfucker! Get me a vodka and I’ll do it!
Leamington Spa
England
Overheard by: Bleep
Guy #1, after British tourists leave elevator: Stupid British bitches.
Guy #2: Wow, you hate Brits?
Guy #1: You know it.
Guy #2: But Maggie is British, and you like her.
Guy #1: Yeah, well, that’s because Maggie is a tranny.
Hotel Whitcomb
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Adam
3L law student: He’s just irritating. He’s like one of those people who masturbates to Scalia decisions.
http://overheardinlawschool.blogspot.com/2007/03/im-kennedy-man-myself.html
Tween girl #1: Oh my god… You look so orange in that picture!
Tween girl #2: Bitch.
Tween girl #1: No! It’s a good thing! Orange is the new pink!
Switzerland
Guy #1, shocked and angry: Dude, she’s autistic!
Guy #2: Yeah! But she’s a full functioning autistic, so fuck you for judging.
Ikea
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Ferdinand
Female student #1: Eeew, she has a rolling backpack, you know what that means…
Female student #2: Whore?
Female student #1: Absolutely not what I was going to say.
San Francisco, California
Hat Tip 🎩 to The Marketing Scientist