Little girl to priest: Why is it called ‘Good Friday’ if that’s when they killed Jesus?
Homestead, Florida
Archive for the ‘Jesus’ Category
And Don’t Get Me Started on the Blood, Dawg
Pastor, placing a piece of bread in guy’s hand: The body of Christ, given to you.
Teen girl, just in earshot: The body be stale, yo.
Teen girl’s friend: I hear ya.
St. Jude’s Church
Oakville, Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: Feebriel
Mmm, Sacrilicious
Stoner: That’s like saying Jesus and Gandhi are the same. A Gandhi would be the cinnamon bun and Jesus would be the cinnabon.
100 Main Street
Cincinnati, Ohio
You’re Not Sure What to Bite Off First
Chick to friend: I really thought the chocolate Jesus with the giant dick would sell!
Missouri State University
Springfield, Missouri
Overheard by: Carri Jo
Taught Me the “White Elephant”
College guy: I went to sleep-away camp so long ago my counselor was Jesus Christ!
University of Rochester
Rochester, New York
He’s a Savory Savior
Guy to girl in bar: What did you have, some of that Blood of Christ?
Girl: Yeah!
Guy: Yeah?!
Girl: Yeah! It’s yummy!
Bar
Lincoln, Nebraska
Overheard by: Jill
Keep Your Friends Close and Your Motherfuckers Even Closer
20-something guy to another: He found Jesus. In the two months I hadn’t seen him, the motherfucker found Jesus.
Swinger’s
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: Kristin
…I’ve Been Saving That Up All Semester.
Elderly Bible as Literature professor: People often say things that catch people off guard. Like if I said even Jesus shat.
(entire class goes completely silent)
Professor: Holy shit, huh?
College
Massachusetts
He Eat Brains! … Oh, Wait
Lady with mic: Nothing is more powerful than Jesus! He die; he get up!
http://overheardinpdx.blogspot.com/2007/04/remax.html
Overheard by: lab
In That He Told God Everything
Kid #1: … And so, there is an alpha male among rats–
Kid #2, interrupting: –Jesus Christ was a rat!
City High School
Iowa
