Archive for the ‘Military’ Category

You Mean, Like, Jer­sey Shore?

Ma­rine with no game to clear­ly un­in­ter­est­ed sales clerk: And we marines say “sem­per fi” to each oth­er, do you know what that means?
Sales girl: Yeah, it…
Ma­rine, in­ter­rupt­ing: It means “al­ways faith­ful.” It’s like Russ­ian or some shit… No. Maybe Ital­ian… Yeah, it’s Ital­ian.

Mall
Birm­ing­ham, Al­aba­ma

And Then I’ll Have to French-Kiss You, in a “Thank-You-for-Smack­ing-Me” Kind Of Way

Ma­rine #1, on plane: Since you got the win­dow seat, I might lean my head on your shoul­der for part of this flight. Not in a gay way, more in a I’m-tired-and-want-to-lean-my-head-on-some­thing kind of way.
Ma­rine #2: Al­right, but I might have to smack you. Not in an I‑hate-you kind of way, more in a get-your-head-off-my-damn-shoul­der kind of way.

Air­plane
At­lanta, Geor­gia