Archive for the ‘Names’ Category

No Wonder It’s Spreading So Fast

Teen #1 coming out of arrival gate to friend: So, when do we start coughing, sneezing and squealing to freak people out?
Teen #2: Dude, people with the swine flu don’t squeal!
Teen #1: Then why the hell do they call it that?
Teen #2, jokingly: Because you have to fuck a pig to get it?
Teen #1, seriously: Well, that makes sense!

Logan Airport
Boston, Massachusetts

Then There Are the Brave Few Who Would Join Me on This Pole

Professor: Say that you were to walk into class, and I was wearing…a red thong.
(students laugh) I’m not done. I also have sequins on my nipples–and my hair is in a red Mohawk. Half of you would turn around and walk out. The other half would think, “Eh, I can always drop the class.”

Santa Rosa Junior College
Santa Rosa, California