Archive for the ‘New Jersey’ Category

This Bullet, for Instance

Dude: So, what is this? Like, an energy drink, too?
Barista: Nah, it’s just a soda.
Dude: Hmmm, white grape juice, filtered carbonated water… It does have like 22 grams of sugar, but I guess it’s like natural sugar, so it’s not so bad, right?
Barista: I don’t know, it might kill ya!
Dude: Yeah, but I think that things that kill you make you smarter.

Jersey City, New Jersey

An Institution Worth Protecting

Obese middle-aged tourist to husband: I called him and told him we're at passenger pick-up 2. He called and asked where we'd be, and I said passenger pick-up 2, that's where he can find us. It's just easier to find us when he gets here. Passenger pick-up 2. And it's cold. That's why I brought this vest. I brought this vest in case it got cold, and it got cold. I'm going to button it up. Did you hear me? I'm going to button it up. There, it's buttoned. (husband ignores her)

Newark Airport, New Jersey

Overheard by: EthanK