Girl #1: Do you have a boyfriend?
Girl #2: No! I’m not gay!
Auckland
New Zealand
Overheard by: Louise
Archive for the ‘New Zealand’ Category
It Needs Watering, If You Follow Me
Woman on phone: As long as she can wear it without showing her lady garden, then that’s fine by me.
Christchurch
New Zealand
Clearly, You Are No Donna Reed
Hipster guy: I cried so much when I watched it.
Hipster girl: It’s a Wonderful Life made you cry? Ha!
Hipster guy: Shhhh! (looks around furtively)
Wellington
New Zealand
Hope You Bitches Saved Me Some Weed
Mom: Why is the tv on with the mute on?
Daughter #1: Cause of the pretty moving pictures!
Daughter #2: Yeah! It’s like an aquarium, but with Tom Hanks.
Upper Hutt
New Zealand
Overheard by: Kat
And What Kind Of a Lame-Ass Answer Is “Energy”?
Tutor: So what are some things you associate with lemons?
Student #1: Yellow!
Student #2: Energy!
Student #3: Gin-an-tonic!
Tutor: What? Genitalia? Who said genitalia?
Massey University
Wellington
New Zealand
When the Religious Right Goes Too Far
Teen #1: Did you know tumors can sometimes grow hair and teeth?
Teen #2, stunned: Um, those aren’t tumors. Th-those are babies.
Wild Thyme Restaurant
Queenstown
New Zealand
I Gotta Learn How to Pregame
Girl #1: I came really fast, apparently.
Girl #2: Wow, really?
Girl #1: Yeah. (sighs) If only we weren’t talking about childbirth.
Auckland
New Zealand
That’s the Nature of the Therapeutic Relationship
Woman: Well, yes, of course I’m making it all up. But you know it’s true.
Friend: Oh, yes!
Auckland
New Zealand
Overheard by: Ross
Your Father Is by Far the Obvious Choice
Five-year-old girl to sister: Who would you rather kill — Mummy or Daddy?
Mother: I don’t want to hear you talking like that.
Auckland
New Zealand
Overheard by: disturbed
Me, Nature, and Judge Judy
Chemistry professor: Now, it may seem that nature has gotten it wrong–but like me, nature never gets it wrong.
University of Auckland
New Zealand
