Cashier: Want to hear the lamest shit? I went to get Subway for lunch… And they were out of bread! Completely out! What the fuck is up with that?
Norman, Oklahoma
Archive for the ‘Oklahoma’ Category
Keeps Me Running in Tip-Top Shape
Chick: I really think my gynecologist helps our relationship, though.
Starbucks
Edmond, Oklahoma
NewsFlash: X‑Treme Sex Gains Popularity on College Campuses
Roommate on phone: You’ve gotta get through the ribcage.
University of Oklahoma
Norman, Oklahoma
Overheard by: Wondering what they’re planning.
Yeah. I Guess.
Guy: Men are bastards. I’m a man.
Girl: Then what does that make you?
Guy: Huh?
Girl: You said men are bastards. So then what does that make you?
Guy, not paying attention: Wanna dance?
Norman, Oklahoma
“Tulsa” Spelled Backwards Is “a Slut”– Coincidence?
Teen girl to friend: I’m too sexy for my vulva.
Tulsa, Oklahoma
Why Many Therapists Quit.
30-something woman to 20-something woman: I had a crush–a psychotic crush–on Viggo Mortensen, and only you would understand. I hallucinated that he read me poetry!
Norman, Oklahoma
Will It Make a Difference If He’s Guatemalan?
Chick: Just imagine — you go home and your mother has a hot Ecuadorian boy stashed in the back bedroom.
University of Tulsa
Tulsa, Oklahoma
When Straight Guys Are Forced to Watch Martha Stewart
20-something loud man: I would not put my dick in her ear. That’s how not interested I am.
Norman, Oklahoma
I Don’t Know Whether To Laugh, Say “Awww.…”, Call DSS, Or Puke In My Mouth
Lady on cell: Just because she’s wearing big-girl panties doesn’t mean she’s not your baby.
Target
Midwest City, Okahoma
Time to Invest in Some Bose Headphones, Dear Reader
Female heard through the wall, after giving blow job: That’s all you have to say? “Thanks?“
Male, through wall: Moshi-moshi.
Female, exasperated: See, that’s your problem! Half the time you don’t even speak English anymore!
Male: That was “thank you” in Japanese.
Female: Oh.
Norman, Oklahoma
