I Got­ta Learn How to Pregame

Girl #1: I came re­al­ly fast, ap­par­ent­ly.
Girl #2: Wow, re­al­ly?
Girl #1: Yeah. (sighs) If on­ly we weren’t talk­ing about child­birth.

Auck­land
New Zealand

The Spon­ta­neous Ad­mis­sion to Grad School Is Just a Myth

Phi­los­o­phy pro­fes­sor: He chose this ex­am­ple be­cause it had sex ap­peal. It turned peo­ple on.
(changes Pow­er­Point slide to pic­ture of bac­te­r­i­al fla­gel­lum)
Male stu­dent: Ohh­h­hh!
Pro­fes­sor: Please don’t have an or­gasm in my class.

Ly­coming Col­lege
Williamsport, Penn­syl­va­nia

Se­ri­ous­ly, What Makes Peo­ple Think That?

Goth girl on cell: His dick is huge! I came so hard I was cry­ing! (no­tices sev­er­al peo­ple look­ing at her and laugh­ing) Do you fuck­ing mind? This is a pri­vate con­ver­sa­tion!

Red Line Train
Wash­ing­ton, DC

Over­heard by: Joe

…Here Comes An­oth­er One

Teen girl: This skirt is so short! My legs are freez­ing!
Teen boy: Mine are fine.
Teen girl: That’s be­cause of your in­tense or­gasms.
Teen boy: True.

Star­bucks
Burling­ton, Ver­mont

Over­heard by: Sweenan A. Morn­stuy

Bet She’s Bar­rels of Fun in Bed

Girl #1: Come on! Let’s go!
Girl #2, drink­ing her milk­shake: Could you just be qui­et for a minute? I’m kin­da in the mid­dle of an or­gasm!

Fast food joint
Fair­fax, Cal­i­for­nia

Over­heard by: slovett

Plus It Was a Vi­brat­ing Train Seat, Not a Per­son.

Guy on phone: Nah, nah, it’s not cheat­ing! I did­n’t ejac­u­late, so it’s not cheat­ing!

King’s Cross
Aus­tralia

Over­heard by: high­ly amused

In My Day, We Made Do with Elec­tric Tooth­brush­es and Wash­ing Ma­chines

Woman #1: So, all these women are go­ing sky­div­ing now, be­cause you can have an or­gasm against the up­draft.
Woman #2 (en­thu­si­as­ti­cal­ly): Oh, that’s great!

Olympic Sculp­ture Gar­den
Seat­tle, Wash­ing­ton

That’s a De­scrip­tion Best Saved for Molten Choco­late Cake

Chick #1: That’s the best episode of Sponge­Bob ever.
Chick #2: I knooow!
Chick #1: It’s like an or­gasm!
Chick #2: No. (pause) No, it’s not.

Lit­tle­ton, Col­orado

…When Every­one Knows the Point Of Sex Is to Tone One’s Abs.

An­thro­pol­o­gy teacher: That’s just like say­ing the point of sex is to have an or­gasm. If that were the case you could do it your­self! There’s no need to in­volve an­oth­er per­son!

Uni­ver­si­ty of Delaware

Over­heard by: Ter­rance Williams

Even with­out the Wink She’d Know How You Feel

Adorable pro­fes­sor, wink­ing: See, now, it would be just like I came on Beth* and then winked at her.

Haver­ford Col­lege
http://overheardinphilly.blogspot.com/2007/03/you-keep-using-that-phrase-i-do-not.html

Over­heard by: not beth