Archive for the ‘Overheard at Cornell’ Category

Some­one Needs to Hold Up the Score Cards

Grad stu­dent #1: Yeah, it is re­al­ly hard. They have to wait and see how much, like, brain mat­ter they share.
Grad stu­dent #2: What does the one twin do while the oth­er twin has sex?
Grad stu­dent #1: I think he just lays there and is re­al­ly un­com­fort­able.
Grad stu­dent #2: Awk­ward.

http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/2007/01/breaks-broke.html

Over­heard by: llouie

I Think We Should See Oth­er Peo­ple

Boyfriend: Do you still have my keys?
Girl­friend: Yeah, I stopped by your house to bring them back, but I could­n’t get in.
Boyfriend: What do you mean you could­n’t get in?
Girl­friend: Well, you weren’t home, and no one else an­swered the door.
Boyfriend: … You had my keys!

http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/

Over­heard by: kgm

It’s $20 Ex­tra to See My Pe­ri­od­ic Ta­ble

Guy on cell: I’m drunk as fuck right now… Yeah, I went out af­ter my chem test, and they had strip­pers! Got a lap dance… She was ban­gin’. You wan­na know the best part, dude? I’m do­ing home­work, ha­ha!… Yeah, it’s due to­mor­row.

http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/2006/11/ten-days-all-at-once-huge-update.html

Over­heard by: zui

I Did­n’t Drop the Oth­er One on the Floor

Dude, ap­proach­ing ta­ble of peo­ple: Ex­cuse me? Hi, I no­ticed you put your sal­ad in the mi­crowave, and I was just won­der­ing… Why?
Asian guy: Why not?
Dude: Well, it’s just… you had two… And you did­n’t put the oth­er one in… I have to know!

http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/2007/02/monday-madness.html

Over­heard by: a’­da