Archive for the ‘Overheard at Cornell’ Category

Some­one Needs to Hold Up the Score Cards

Grad stu­dent #1: Yeah, it is re­al­ly hard. They have to wait and see how much, like, brain mat­ter they share.
Grad stu­dent #2: What does the one twin do while the oth­er twin has sex?
Grad stu­dent #1: I think he just lays there and is re­al­ly un­com­fort­able.
Grad stu­dent #2: Awk­ward.

Over­heard by: llouie

I Think We Should See Oth­er Peo­ple

Boyfriend: Do you still have my keys?
Girl­friend: Yeah, I stopped by your house to bring them back, but I could­n’t get in.
Boyfriend: What do you mean you could­n’t get in?
Girl­friend: Well, you weren’t home, and no one else an­swered the door.
Boyfriend: … You had my keys!

Over­heard by: kgm

It’s $20 Ex­tra to See My Pe­ri­od­ic Ta­ble

Guy on cell: I’m drunk as fuck right now… Yeah, I went out af­ter my chem test, and they had strip­pers! Got a lap dance… She was ban­gin’. You wan­na know the best part, dude? I’m do­ing home­work, ha­ha!… Yeah, it’s due to­mor­row.

Over­heard by: zui