Frat boy: We are Ivy League educated men — we can figure out how to turn a bed sheet into a toga.
http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/2006/12/big-honking-update.html
Overheard by: maria
Archive for the ‘Overheard at Cornell’ Category
Someone Needs to Hold Up the Score Cards
Grad student #1: Yeah, it is really hard. They have to wait and see how much, like, brain matter they share.
Grad student #2: What does the one twin do while the other twin has sex?
Grad student #1: I think he just lays there and is really uncomfortable.
Grad student #2: Awkward.
http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/2007/01/breaks-broke.html
Overheard by: llouie
I Think We Should See Other People
Boyfriend: Do you still have my keys?
Girlfriend: Yeah, I stopped by your house to bring them back, but I couldn’t get in.
Boyfriend: What do you mean you couldn’t get in?
Girlfriend: Well, you weren’t home, and no one else answered the door.
Boyfriend: … You had my keys!
http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/
Overheard by: kgm
It’s $20 Extra to See My Periodic Table
Guy on cell: I’m drunk as fuck right now… Yeah, I went out after my chem test, and they had strippers! Got a lap dance… She was bangin’. You wanna know the best part, dude? I’m doing homework, haha!… Yeah, it’s due tomorrow.
http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/2006/11/ten-days-all-at-once-huge-update.html
Overheard by: zui
I Know Exactly Where They’ve Been
Dude on cell: No, I really don’t want to put your balls in my mouth, thank you very much.
http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/2006/10/long-overdue-update-part‑2.html
Overheard by: laura
Undeserved Sympathy Is Better Than Being Ignored
Girl: I like wearing this hat because it makes me look like a cancer patient.
http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/2007/04/long-time-no-update.html
Overheard by: wb
I’d Still Be Motorboating Her If the EMTs Hadn’t Intervened
Drunk frat boy: I don’t care that she was three hundred pounds, she still had a phenomenal rack!
http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/2006/11/ten-days-all-at-once-huge-update.html
Overheard by: hearing aid
Skid or Stretch?
Sorostitute yelling at friend: I can see the marks on your butt from over here!
http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/2007/04/april-is-cruelest-month.html
Overheard by: yix
I Didn’t Drop the Other One on the Floor
Dude, approaching table of people: Excuse me? Hi, I noticed you put your salad in the microwave, and I was just wondering… Why?
Asian guy: Why not?
Dude: Well, it’s just… you had two… And you didn’t put the other one in… I have to know!
http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/2007/02/monday-madness.html
Overheard by: a’da
… Warn Them about Your Jagged Left Nut?
Chick on cell: You’re gonna go rubbin’ your balls all over other girls and I can’t even…?
http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/2007/02/monday-madness.html
Overheard by: lichka
