Archive for the ‘Porn’ Category

And This.…Surprises You?

Woman waiting for coffee: You know my sister is a Playboy model?
Friend: (blank stare)
Woman waiting for coffee: Yeah! She sends me the pictures. I mean, she’s beautiful, but I don’t wanna see that. And my brother, he looks at those!
Friend: (blank stare)

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/455563420/all-in-the-family.html

Overheard by: next in line.

…The Golden Retriever Did What with the Banana?

Girl: So… How did your sex tape go?

Lexington, Kentucky

Overheard by: AJ

That Is So Cliche.

Working-class hippie: Oh, I have another porn story!
Foreign hippie: The one about your mom?
Working-class hippie: No, no, this one’s about Matt*–my surrogate father.

Amherst, Massachusetts

…Was What I Loved About 2 Girls 1 Cup

Girl: It was like a porno, but with a plot!

University of Massachusetts

Overheard by: Robin

Dude, It Has the Word “Vajayjay” on the Cover

Twelve-year-old boy to friend: I didn’t know bookstores had porn!
Friend: Dude, that’s Cosmo!

Barnes & Noble
Illinois

Colorado Libraries Are Full Of the Stuff

Geeky girl: You know, I’ve still got my ex-boyfriend’s mom’s library card.
Goth friend: …We should totally go and check out, like, animal porn with it.

Aurora, Colorado

Who Knew That Would Ever Turn Out to Be a Bad Idea?

Woman #1: Do you want to become a judge?
Woman #2: No way!
Woman #1: Why not?
Woman #2: I have too many naked photos on the internet out there of me!

Coffee Shop
Salt Lake City

Overheard by: Snazzy

Did the Pizza Guy Even Apologize for Walking in on You in the Shower?

Chick #1: I was like, “I thought that shit only happened in porn!“
Chick #2: Or movies.
Chick #1: Oh. Yeah.

Cafe
Denver, Colorado

…I Allowed the Holy Spirit Into My Life.

Disgruntled freshman girl #1: Ugh, I hate that guy. He is like, you know, so… Ugh!
Disgruntled freshman girl #2: I know, right?
Rude sophomore guy, interrupting: Oh, me and him? We’re like porn buddies!
(awkward silence from girls)
Rude sophomore guy: What? That was like, before.

Cainta
Rizal
Philippines

Overheard by: happened to be eating lunch

If the Tagline Isn’t “Gotta Fuck Them All” Then Someon Made a Mistake

Girl: The first Pokemon movie was really sad.
Guy #1: Oh, yeah! It made me cry.
Girl: I couldn’t believe when Pikachu almost died…
Guy #2: Have you guys seen Pokemon porn?
Girl: Okay, let’s just stop right there.
Guy #2: No, it’s crazy. You know Misty? She’ll do like anything!

Hartford, Connecticut

Overheard by: Claire

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