Archive for the ‘Preggers’ Category

You Might As Well Face It, You’re Ad­dict­ed to Lumps

Very preg­nant woman sur­round­ed by mis­be­hav­ing chil­dren: Preg­nan­cy is just such a gift. I mean, I feel so blessed. Like, this is what my body was made for, you know? I just feel so much more com­plete when I’m preg­nant. Know­ing that I’m grow­ing this life…
Young woman be­hind her in line, in­ter­rupt­ing: Madam? You are a walk­ing ad­ver­tise­ment for manda­to­ry birth con­trol.

Seat­tle, Wash­ing­ton

Over­heard by: The guy ap­plaud­ing her

We’re Hop­ing for a Mup­pet Ba­by

Mid­dle aged fe­male client: You aren’t go­ing to find out the sex? How are you go­ing to know what col­or to paint the nurs­ery or what kind of ba­by clothes to get?
Preg­nant 30-some­thing hair styl­ist: Oh, please, like it mat­ters what col­ors I choose. Peo­ple aren’t go­ing to be won­der­ing if it’s a girl or a boy, any­way; they’re go­ing to won­der if it’s an an­i­mal or a ba­by.

Over­heard by: jenc17

It’s My Pre­rog­a­tive

Young preg­nant moth­er, grate­ful­ly ac­cept­ing seat on crowd­ed tram: Come over here and sit with mum­my, Adam.
Four-year-old: Noooooooooo.
Moth­er: C’­mon, Adam, come sit with mum­my.
Four-year-old: Noooooooo (but slinks over and sits down any­way)
Moth­er: Bet­ter?
Four-year-old: You’ve ru­ined my life, mom.
Moth­er: Yes, hon­ey, I know.


Over­heard by: Soap Oprah