Sorority girl #1: I may as well go around and sleep with all the people everyone thinks I’m sleeping with…
Sorority girl #2: I would *so* not judge you for that.
Bryant University
Smithfield, Rhode Island
Archive for the ‘Rhode Island’ Category
Their Lullabies Are the Stuff of Nightmares
Professor, on possible Nazi allusions in animation: Well, it was a German film, and any time you hear German muttering, it’s harsh words and armbands.
Rhode Island School of Design
Rhode Island
Overheard by: Sandro
Of Mufflers and Men?
Guy #1: Check out that girl’s ensemble. Interesting.
Gut #2: I bet she read a book about how to wear her scarf.
Antonio’s Pizza
Providence, Rhode Island
Overheard by: Chris
…For Being So Gay.
Oversexed frat boy at house party: Yeah! We’re gonna shoot ’em with our sperm cannons!
Providence, Rhode Island
Overheard by: Katie M
Tonight, on Mystery Quote Theater…
Girl #1: She defriended me!
Girl #2: Well, that explains the shoes.
Brown University
Providence, Rhode Island
As You Should Know All Too Well, Cuntrella
Teacher: Does anyone know how to spell that?
(silence)
Student: Looks like it’s time to whip out the dic!
Teacher: Some words should *not* be shortened.
High School Classroom
Rhode Island
And at Least the Newport Jazz Festival Is Over in Three Days
Guy in suit: I said, “It’s better than a Chinese prison, you should be used to it by now.”
Memorial Union Bus Stop
University of Rhode Island, Kingston, Rhode Island
Overheard by: Jo
Who’s Going As Pontius Pilate of Nottingham?
Bimbette, looking at halloween costumes online with her boyfriend: Oh, look! You can go as Robin Hood and I’ll be Mary Magdalene!
RIC College
Providence, Rhode Island
Invented by Mister Newton.
Professor: So, I can see that some of you try to care about my feelings, and others don’t give a fig.
Student #1: Whoa! Could you not use such harsh vegetables?
(entire class goes silent)
Student #2: I didn’t know a “fig” was a vegetable.
Student #3: I thought it was a grape. A dried grape.
Johnson & Wales University
Providence, Rhode Island
If No One Hears Them, Are They Really Dead?
Man: There are mutes dying all over the world, and they can’t say anything! So here I am…
Providence, Rhode Island
