Skinny boy at the back of the classroom: I had a Pop-Tart for breakfast!
Teacher, horrified: Why? Oh my god, why?!
Middle School
North Carolina
Archive for the ‘School [Elem., Middle, & High]’ Category
The More Absurd It Is, the Better. Like Christianity
Gym teacher, during stretches: If you do it this way, it makes it easier and also more challenging.
Henry Wise Wood High School
Calgary
Canadia
Which Explains Our 1980's Haircuts
Sophomore #1: I mean, I don't really keep up with current events that much.
Sophomore #2: You need watch the news. Seriously. It's the twentieth century.
High School
Kentucky
Overheard by: Oh, high school
That's What You Said Outside That Jonas Brothers Concert!
Girl to friend, after unsuccessfully trying to open locked front doors: Maybe they'll let us in if we bang hard enough.
High School
San Francisco, California
You're Just Supposed to Be Having Sex Shamefully in Cars and Stairwells
Boy: Yo soy sexy.
Teacher, hyperventilating: You can't say you're sexy! You're only fifteen years old!
Spanish Class
El Paso, Texas
And Get That Hannah Montana Ringtone I've Been Wanting
Hipster boy: So, are you doing that post-bac pre-med thing?
Hipster girl: I dunno…I don't really know what I wanna do.
Hipster boy: Really, you don't wanna do medicine anymore?
Hipster girl: I dunno, I wish I could like, win the lottery. Then I'd go to like, Ghana, and just save people.
NYU Elevator
It Makes Up for My Lack Of Boobs.
Short Asian chick to tall white guy: Oh my gawd, I've got it! So, heat rises, right? So it's probably all warm up there where you are, and down here with the normal people it's cold, and that's why you don't think it's cold, even though it's freaking freezing! Gawd, I love being an Asian! I come up with the most genius shit!
Muirlands Middle School
La Jolla, California
Prison Pretty Much Takes Care Of That, Anyway.
Teacher: So… then, what should happen to the guy?
Student #1: I think he should be sent to jail.
Student #2: I think that since he killed his neighbor, he should have to be killed himself. Get the death penalty. Ya know… “eye for an eye”.
Student #3: That's the stupidest thing in the world. It doesn't work in all situations.
Student #2: Yes it does! Let's say some guy molests a kid, then the guy should… (pause) Ok… Nevermind.
High School
Illinois
Or More Accurately, Not Having Sex With White Girls
White student #1: Yeah, it's a good thing I'm not going to that preppy high school anymore.
White student #2: Yeah, I agree.
White student #3: You'd probably still be having sex with white girls.
Deerfield Beach High School
Florida
Nothing That Happens in New Jersey Qualifies As Real Life
Algebra class kid: Will we ever use this stuff in real life?
Teacher: No. You won't.
Middle School Algebra Class
New Jersey