Physics professor demonstrating electrical charges: I have my magic wand and my magic fur. Now, I’m going to rub my magic wand with my magic fur!
Allegheny College
Meadville, Pennsylvania
Archive for the ‘Science’ Category
Nurture's No Mother Teresa Either
Physics professor: Nature doesn't care what you think.
De Anza College
Cupertino, California
Overheard by: shyinvisiblegirl loves physics
That, or a Phone.
Teacher: Who knows what the word “cell” means?
4th-grader: Oh, I do, I do! It's a tiny thing like a jelly doughnut! Except instead of jelly, there's blood!
Elementary School
Washington, DC
Ah Well, You Can Always Become President.
Professor: Isaac Newton, on his deathbed, was proud to announce that he was a virgin. So if any of you want to be famous scientists, you are going to have to be willing to make a few sacrifices.
Girl, raising hand: Um.
Professor: Oh, is it too late?
De Anza Community College
Cupertino, California
Overheard by: shyinvisiblegirl loves physics
That's What You Said About Menstruation!
Professor: How does a microwave work?
Student: Electromagnetic waves.
Professor: Oh, “electromagnetic waves”! That's a fancy way of saying “magic.”
University of Delaware
Overheard by: Magician
It’s a Bloody Miracle
Male student, about an exam: What do we have to know about the external parts of the female reproductive system?
Professor: Everything! Not just for the exam, but for yourself! All of you!
Rutgers University
New Jersey
Overheard by: Marina
Yay! Let's All Join the Army!
Girl #1, loudly in quiet library: And we thought we were going to the lecture on reasons to join the army, but we accidentally went to the wrong lecture theater, and it was a medical lecture on burns patients!
Studying girl: Shhhhh!
Girl #1, loudly: And this med guy who knew we weren't med students goes “This is a good lecture to come to! Lots of gory pictures!” and we were both thinking “Shit! Are these army people going to show us photos of people who have been blown up or something!?”
Studying boy and girl: Shhhhhhhh!
Girl #2: Can't be as bad as that lecture from first year. Remember the photo of the person's head who'd been run over by a train?
Girl #1, even more loudly: Yeah! And they showed us photos of a penis which had been bitten off!
(everyone in library, including studying boy and girl, burst out laughing)
Griffith University Library
Australia
‘Cause I Can Only Think of Star Jones and Ringo Starr
Blonde student to astronomy professor: Can you tell me approximately how many stars there are in our solar system?
Wheaton College
Wheaton, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Amycakes
I Eat It Before Those Orgies with the Football Team
College girl #1: Eating raw fish makes you super fertile.
College girl #2: Really?
College girl #1: Yeah, thats why I get pregnant so much.
Japanese Restaurant
Richmond, Virginia
Like an Open Spirit and Three Hits of Acid
Teacher: What you get from Beatlerama depends on what you bring to it.
Science class
Richmond, Virginia
Overheard by: mollydear