Overheard Everywhere

Archive for the ‘Sex’ Category

Is This Any More Stu­pid Than the Po­lit­i­cal In­ter­pre­ta­tion? Dis­cuss.

Teenage girl #1, ex­plain­ing Shake­speare to friend: So, ba­si­cal­ly, Romeo is, like, a man whore. As soon as he knows some chick won’t have sex with him he gets all pis­sy and emo and goes af­ter some­one else.
Teenage girl #2: So, like, he just wants to make ba­bies? Man, I al­ways thought it was more ro­man­tic!
Teenage girl #1: Nope. He just wants to hop in­to bed with who­ev­er’s avail­able.

Birm­ing­ham, Al­aba­ma

No­body Can Do Sex­u­al Ha­rass­ment Like the In­sane

Crazy bag la­dy, loud­ly: I don’t suck dick for pussy! I don’t suck dick for pussy! I don’t suck dick for pussy!
(sits down next to an­oth­er pas­sen­ger on the sub­way)
Crazy bag la­dy, now in pas­sen­ger’s face: I don’t suck dick for pussy!
(fe­male pas­sen­ger gets up and moves)
Crazy bag la­dy: Why you jump­ing? Why you jump­ing, bitch!? You weren’t jumpin’ last night when that guy put his long ass dick in you last night!
Fe­male pas­sen­ger: Ex­cuse me, ma’am, don’t say that to me! You don’t know me!
(sub­way train stops)
Con­duc­tor: City Hall sta­tion!
Fe­male pas­sen­ger: Ex­cuse me, sir, there’s a crazy la­dy on the sub­way ha­rass­ing the oth­er pas­sen­gers.
Con­duc­tor: Oh, could you point her out to me?
(fe­male pas­sen­ger points to crazy woman yelling)
Con­duc­tor: Ma’am, are you both­er­ing peo­ple?
Crazy bag la­dy: Why you tryin’ to fuck me stand­ing up!? Why don’t you fuck me ly­ing down like a gen­tle­man!
Con­duc­tor: Ma’am, I’m call­ing the po­lice.

Broad Street Line Sub­way
Philadel­phia, Penn­syl­va­nia

Be­sides, Was­n’t Har­man­fa­dites a King Of Per­sia?

Male stu­dent: We were learn­ing about har­man­fa­dites in my psych class to­day.
Fe­male stu­dent: What’s that?
Male stu­dent It’s when a per­son is born with boy and girl parts.
Fe­male stu­dent: Nasty.
Male stu­dent: Yeah. I was won­der­ing, if two of them have sex, are they both gay? Or les­bians?
Fe­male stu­dent: I can’t talk about this while I am eat­ing.

Wayne State Uni­ver­si­ty
De­troit, Michi­gan

Over­heard by: Jon­son

His G‑String with the Ele­phant Head on It Was a Bit of a Shock, Though

Sum­mer fun Bar­bie #1: I mean, like, I was­n’t even sur­prised that you went home with him!
Sum­mer fun Bar­bie #2: Do you mean that I had sex with him?
Sum­mer fun Bar­bie #1: Yeah.
Sum­mer fun Bar­bie #2: Yeah, me nei­ther.

http://www.overheardinminneapolis.com/2007/06/im_still_laughing_over_summer.html

Over­heard by: al­so not sur­prised