Archive for the ‘Sex’ Category

That’s So Cute

Lady: … So she goes, ‘I don’t even know if it counts as sex. It was just, like, in and out in one second.’ And she’s only fifteen!

Restaurant, Belltown
Seattle, Washington

Overheard by: of bugle be uncouth

You’d Rather Be Cheated on with Someone Ugly?

Hot girl: So when I finally met the girl he cheated on me with, I was in shock, because she was about a thousand times hotter than she looked on the picture I found.
Guy friend: Yeah. Well, some people are just not photogenic.
Hot girl: No, you don’t understand! She’s like supermodel hot, he had like no choice, even I would have fucked that Moroccan bitch right then and there.
Guy friend: That’s so hot.
Hot girl: Life is not fair.

Starbucks

I Remember the First Time I Felt the Sting for Forceable Intercourse and the Warmth Of Dirt…

Tour guide: The vestal virgins would be raped and buried alive if they were no longer virgins. If they let the fire go out, they would just be buried alive.
Tourist: I dunno if that’s any better.
Little old Japanese woman: Hey, at least the first way you get some thrills.

Colosseum
Rome
Italy