Boy, screaming into pregnant mother’s belly: We’re going to give you up for adoption!
Tanger Outlet
Riverhead, New York
Overheard by: bemused
Archive for the ‘Stores’ Category
The One with Big, Glossy Pictures Instead of Words
Man to store employee: It’s one of those real estate investment books, the yellow ones.
Employee: Let’s see, follow me… Is this what you were looking for?
Man: No, no, that’s the one for idiots, I want the one for dummies.
Barnes & Noble
San Diego, California
Overheard by: Lisa
With the Confucianism on the Side
Yoga lady: I mean, really: just give me the Eskimo sex, not the cannibalism.
Powell’s Bookstore
Portland, Oregon
Overheard by: kate
And Then We’ll Hold This Nice Man Up.
Father with two small sons dressed in Halloween costumes, walking into liquor store: Okay, guys, now pick out the kind of whiskey you want and go put it up on the counter.
Oshkosh, Wisconsin
And They’re Less Of a Drag
Hobo walking out of convenience store, tapping a pack of cigarettes to his hobo lady: I don’t need you anymore. I got cigarettes.
San Diego, California
Overheard by: Matt
.…If There Any Left
College kid: Excuse me, what is the difference between these potato pancakes and a potato latka?
Grocery stocker: Um, I don’t know what a latka is, so I couldn’t tell you.
College kid: A Jewish potato pancake.
Grocery stocker: Well, those potato pancakes are German.
College kid: I wonder if a German Jew would eat them.
Sendik’s Grocery Store
Grafton, Wisconsin
Overheard by: Arthur
It’s Not Gay If It’s About Video Games
10-year-old boy to GameStop guy, after purchasing Mario Galaxy: Bye, I love you! I mean…wait. I meant “thank you.” I didn’t mean it! (runs away)
GameStop
Vestavia Hills, Alabama
Overheard by: that’s what they all say
Kids Are Easily Fooled by Short Haircuts and Baritone Voices
Mother holding small child as she sees a girlfriend: Sammi* look! It’s Debbie! Say hi to Debbie!
Small child: Hi, ugly man!
Target
Traverse City, Michigan
Fowl Behavior?
Woman: So, I want a small frozen turkey.
Meat guy: Okay, just right over here.
Woman: Ewww… What’s wrong with this one?
Meat guy: Sorry?
Woman: Well, is something missing?
Meat guy: Um… No.
Woman: Well, what is this “grain fed” business??
Meat guy: Oh, that means it’s fed with grains.
Woman: Oh! (picks up turkey and leaves)
Grocery Store
Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: Matt C
Now Finish Your Pop Rocks and Soda, and Let’s Go Home
12-year-old girl to younger sibling: Every time you buy a Barbie they give money to the abortion place to give someone like a scholarship for an abortion. Every time you touch a barbie, it’s like touching an abortion.
Toy Store
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: i now want to touch a barbie
