College student: That one answer is wrong. You put a nine instead of a six.
Professor: I was probably stoned at the time.
Sussex, New Jersey
Archive for the ‘Students’ Category
And Did She Swallow That?
Sophomore guy #1: She got pissy that I didn’t want to talk to her anymore.
Sophomore guy #2: What did you do?
Sophomore guy #1: I told her, ‘I have pressing GPA issues to worry about and can’t be concerned with whether or not you are going to be giving me head.’
Dartmouth College
Hanover, New Hampshire
Overheard by: steph
Not When You’re in Them
Student #1: Did you end up taking her to SeaWorld or Busch Gardens or something?
Student #2: Naw, man, I told you — she set all my clothes on fire!
Student #1: See, I think that’s kinky.
Michigan State University
Michigan
Eventually We Worked Out a Timeshare Situation
Girl: So this girl was like: “I want half your pants!”
Hazelwood West High School
Florissant, Missouri
Overheard by: Melissa
Like “Melancholy” or “Pterodactyl”?
Student: What’s “Nostradamus”? It that just some random, made-up word or something?
Rock Bridge High School
Columbia, Missouri
Overheard by: Kelsey
Someone Needs to Hold Up the Score Cards
Grad student #1: Yeah, it is really hard. They have to wait and see how much, like, brain matter they share.
Grad student #2: What does the one twin do while the other twin has sex?
Grad student #1: I think he just lays there and is really uncomfortable.
Grad student #2: Awkward.
http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/2007/01/breaks-broke.html
Overheard by: llouie
And That’s When I Got the Idea, Your Honor
Teacher: Are you guys understanding this?
Class: [Stares blankly.]Teacher: It feels like I’m taking my clothes off.
Class: What?
Teacher: I meant that this is disturbing.
Kenosha, Wisconsin
Or Who You Are, Really
Student librarian on cell: Hey…who is this? Bill from architecture? Well, yeah, I remember writing my name on your arm, but I like don’t remember why.
Music Library, Catholic University
Washington, DC
Overheard by: So much for quiet in the library…
Put Your Hands behind Your Back and Crank Out Some Pushups
Female English major: Can boobs be considered limbs?
Queen’s University
Kingston
Canadia
You’re the Worst Thesis Advisor Ever
Girl walking through campus: I can’t believe you, I’m sitting in my living room in nothing but a towel, with mascara streaming down my face and you don’t even care!
George Mason University
Fairfax, Virginia
Overheard by: You sit on a throne of lies
