Slutty chick to guy next to her: I’m not clever, but I’m sparkly!
New Orleans, Louisiana
Archive for the ‘Stupidity’ Category
When Life Gives You Avocados…
Checker, as customer places avocados on the belt: Are these lemons?
Grocery Store
Centerville, Utah
Overheard by: JC
Portrait Of the Sound-Effects Guy As a Young Man
Biology teacher: Parvo disease is a disease in mammals that can be fatal; squirrels, cats and dogs can all get it.
Kid, whispering quietly to himself: Ruff! Ruff ruff! Kaboom!
Florida
This Ring Symbolizes My No-Footsie Promise
Burly male college student: I don’t want to put my bare feet somewhere where someone’s already put their bare feet.
Murray State University
Kentucky
Is This Any More Stupid Than the Political Interpretation? Discuss.
Teenage girl #1, explaining Shakespeare to friend: So, basically, Romeo is, like, a man whore. As soon as he knows some chick won’t have sex with him he gets all pissy and emo and goes after someone else.
Teenage girl #2: So, like, he just wants to make babies? Man, I always thought it was more romantic!
Teenage girl #1: Nope. He just wants to hop into bed with whoever’s available.
Birmingham, Alabama
Her Weight Gain Cowed the Electorate Into Submission
Mom to five-year-old: I don’t like Oprah Winfrey, because it’s her fault Obama is President.
Denver, Colorado
Overheard by: David Leech
So I’ll Vote for Him, Too.
Middle-aged male Wasp: I’m voting for Wil Armstrong.
Middle-aged female Wasp: Isn’t “Wil” only spelled with one l?
Middle-aged male Wasp: Uh, yeah.
Middle-aged female Wasp: That’s kinda gay.
Denver, Colorado
A High Holy Day for Us Retailians
Girl #1: Well, today wasn’t a total loss, I did find my outfit for tomorrow.
Girl #2: True. By the way, what’s tomorrow?
Girl #1: Uh, Thursday. You mean like the date?
Girl #2: No, I mean: what’s the occasion for the outfit?
Girl #1: Oh, right! Thursday.
Dulles Town Center
Loudoun County, Virginia
Kinda Like Denim and Leggings
Man #1: I know this is stupid, but are buffalo extinct?
Man #2: No, they used to be.
Austin, Texas
As Appropriate As the Word “Oriental,” Anyway
Middle-aged white lady #1: I think I’m going to buy this for my daughter’s boyfriend’s parents. You know, because it’s oriental and they’re oriental.
Middle-aged white lady #2: That is so appropriate!
St. Augustine, Florida
Overheard by: Ruth
