Train conductor, to teenage girl with feet on chair: Can you read? (points to sign)
Teenage girl: What…? Oh, sorry. (takes her feet down, conductor walks away)
Suit: He would have never done that if you were a guy.
New Jersey Transit
Archive for the ‘Suits’ Category
The Lassie “E! True Hollywood Story” Was Too Controversial for TV
40-something suit: You know how sometimes you can love a dog so much it’s, like, illegal?
40-something woman: (looks at him blankly)
40-something suit: You know? So that it’s, like, illegal?
40-something woman, looking straight ahead: Umm, let’s look at Halloween candy.
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/438564745/calling-peta.html
Overheard by: I love my dog, but not that much
All I Mean Is, You Really Stand for Something.
Lady in suit to man in wheelchair: Well, you’re quick on your feet, I’ll give you that. You’re quick on your feet… Oh.
Summer Street
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Julianna
Or Was That the Time I Was Temporarily Decapitated?
40-something suit #1: So you remember when I was dying of melanoma?
40-something suit #2: Is that when you couldn’t go on the golf trip with the boss?
40-something suit #1: Yes, that was it!
Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Overheard by: MilwaukeeBabe
Unless You Count Facebook Status Updates
Suit #1: So you live in the Watergate.
Suit #2: I do. The famous Watergate complex.
Suit #1: It’s famous?
Suit #2: Yeah–the Nixon scandal and everything.
Suit #1: Oh–I don’t really follow current events.
eavesdropdc.blogspot.com
Once It Becomes a Functioning Member of Society, We’ll Talk
Greenpeace volunteer handing out pamphlets: Sir, do you want to help save the environment?
Suit: Absolutely not.
Downtown Crossing
Boston, Massachusetts
Roseanne Barr: The Flight Attendant Years
Angry suit: When is this plane going to take off? I have a very important meeting to get to!
Flight attendant: The incoming plane is delayed, sir, there’s nothing we can do at the moment.
Angry suit: Well, are you going to make arrangements for me to get on another flight? This is urgent! Do you know who I am?
Flight attendant (over loudspeaker): Excuse me, ladies and gentlemen, there is a gentleman at the desk who does not know who he is. If anyone has any information about his identity, please come forward.
Midway Airport
Chicago, Illinois
Maintenance: “When You Put an End to Nude Chair-Hockey, Then We’ll Talk”
Worried suit: That’s why we get our chairs cleaned more than any other department. We get our chairs cleaned every three months. Why doesn’t anyone put a stop to this?
Metro Bus
Seattle, Washington
And at Least the Newport Jazz Festival Is Over in Three Days
Guy in suit: I said, “It’s better than a Chinese prison, you should be used to it by now.”
Memorial Union Bus Stop
University of Rhode Island, Kingston, Rhode Island
Overheard by: Jo
They Are Currently in Place
Well-dressed man to female companion, in crowded tasting room: Did you remember the dildo?
Elegant lady companion: Yes, I brought both of them.
Napa Valley wine Auction
St. Helena, California
