Archive for the ‘Sweden’ Category

And Don’t Even Get Me Start­ed on This Ba­nana Lamp

[Two 18-year-old girls are brows­ing a ta­ble full of ran­dom items for sale at a Chris­t­ian thrift store at a lo­cal church.]Girl #1: This can­dle hold­er would prob­a­bly feel great in­side my pussy.
Girl #2, bare­ly star­tled: Ha­ha. Yeah.
Girl #1: Ooh, this shirt is nice!


Over­heard by: Don­ny Boots

You Need a Day Plan­ner!

Stressed friend: Hur­ry up!
Ston­er: Wait, I just need to brush my teeth.
Stressed friend: Brush your teeth?! You’re go­ing to see your mom and then your deal­er! You do not need to brush your teeth!


Over­heard by: mag­nus

Though, to Be Fair, the Bi­cy­cle Had No Bell.

Girl #1: My grand­fa­ther has won the No­bel Prize!
Girl #2: Re­al­ly?
Girl #1: Yeah, he has one of those tro­phies in his book­shelf!
Jan­i­tor, walk­ing in: Are you sure it was the No­bel Prize?
Girl #1: Yes, I am! Don’t you be­lieve me? I’m gonna call him and ask! (pro­ceeds to call, hangs up sound­ing dis­ap­point­ed)
Jan­i­tor: Well?
Girl #1: Oh, it was not the No­bel Prize. It was on­ly from a bi­cy­cle race.

High School

Over­heard by: Ma­lin

Why Su­per­man Gets So Much Girlie Ac­tion.

Younger heavy met­al guy with old­er cowork­ers: I nev­er find the right size of long johns in the win­ter, so I buy wom­en’s tights in­stead. (old­er cowork­ers look at him in shock) What? I was kid­ding! Morn­ing hu­mor, you know.
Ma­cho guy sit­ting be­hind: Yeah, wom­en’s tights make your junk look big­ger!

Com­muter Train

Over­heard by: strict­ly box­ers.